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Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.

John Barrymore
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My head is buried in the sands of tomorrow while my tail feathers are singed by the hot sun of today.
John Barrymore
Happiness sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open.
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He neither drank smoked nor rode a bicycle. Living frugally saving his money he died early surrounded by greedy relatives. It was a great lesson to me.
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Dying is the last thing I will ever do.
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Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him.
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There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless.
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