Relationship Quotes - Page 5

Fear is the number one reason why people do not take action. The divine irony is that most of the fears we experience are self-generated and born out of our own imaginings, hence the acronym False Evidence Appearing Real.

Susan C.Young

Every one of us, at some time or another, has allowed fear to prevent us from living our best possible life. The first step in conquering our fears is to identify and confront them. Among the most common are:•tFailure•tSuccess•tBeing rejected•tLooking stupid•tFinancial insecurity•tFalling on your face•tBeing vulnerable•tAppearing weak or unhealthy•tExposing your secrets•tBeing alone or unloved•tUpsetting the status quo•tDisappointing others

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, ground yourself in your character values:Building a solid foundation of integrity and character will fortify your confidence to face down fears and take bold action.

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, take a deep breath & relax:When you feel fear, your body tenses up and your thoughts lead you down an anxiety-ridden path. Stop, breathe, relax.

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, interview brave people and learn their secrets.Whom do you know that displays courage and confidence? Ask them for their best practices, mimic their actions, follow their steps, utilize their methods. Ask if they will mentor you.

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, borrow courage.There is inspiration all around you in the form of people who are living your dreams, achieving similar goals, and already succeeding. Knowing that something can be done is often half the battle. Most successful people find great reward in helping others reach for goals.

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, avoid the bystander effect.Rather than standing on the sidelines watching other people achieve their goals, jump in with both feet and get involved.

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, get involved in a cause you are passionate about.Serving a vision bigger than yourself changes your focus from self-doubt to whatever action is necessary for the vision to succeed. “When in doubt, take it out.

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, change your attitude toward failure. Many successful people will tell you that if you aren’t failing, you aren’t trying—that failure is an essential precursor to achieving worthwhile endeavors. Failing (no matter how hard) is one of life’s best teachers for winning the next time.

Susan C.Young

All manners are not created equal and can conjure different interpretations based on the environment in which they are being displayed.

Susan C.Young

What is appropriate in one setting may be entirely inappropriate in another. How you behave at a football game is different than how you behave at your sister’s wedding. How you interact with your closest friends will be different than how you engage with your boss.

Susan C.Young

For more than forty years, Judith Martin has inspired the world with advice on etiquette excellence, proper behavior, and codes of conduct through her critically acclaimed newspaper column, “Miss Manners.” In an interview for her book, Miss Manners Minds Your Business, Mrs. Martin reminds us that “When you go to work, you want a degree of professionalism which does not involve hearing about all of the sordid details of a person’s love life. We are not necessarily all friends, but have a job that needs to be done. A work friend is not always a social friend. One requires distance while the other embraces intimacy.

Susan C.Young

As our society has become more casual, the line between a person’s personal life and professional life has become blurred, especially with the advent of social media. Personal information, your manners (or lack thereof), opinions, and pictures of your private life are available for all the world to see. HR directors, recruiters, and potential employers will often ascertain a person’s manners and moral compass from their online presence.

Susan C.Young

ASK YOURSELF: Are you presenting yourself in the best of all lights, online and off, and demonstrating the dignity of good manners? Make sure of it! If not, it may come back to haunt you.

Susan C.Young

How a person treats wait staff speaks volumes about their character and values. If they misbehave in this scenario, you can likely predict how they will react when cut off in traffic, when their luggage is lost, or when life doesn’t go their way. It is also an indicator to CEOs and hiring managers as to whether a person is a viable candidate for being a considerate team player.

Susan C.Young

Ernest Hemingway was a champion of the common man. He once said, “There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man. True nobility is being superior to your former self.

Susan C.Young

It is unimpressive to not hold a door open for the next person coming through. After a satisfying workout at my gym, I was walking behind a man who was exiting at the same time. He was only about two feet in front of me. As he walked through the door, he let it close behind him, almost hitting me in the face. Was he being intentionally rude? Was he preoccupied and focused on other things? No matter whether an offender is being a jerk intentionally, or is simply oblivious to how his behavior is affecting others, rude behavior instantly makes a negative impression. Be aware!

Susan C.Young

It is unimpressive to interrupt another person while they are talking. Interrupting someone in mid-sentence demonstrates that your focus is on yourself, not the person talking. I had a friend who used a humorous retort whenever someone would interrupt him. He would graciously, albeit sarcastically, say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to speak while you were interrupting.” It always got a laugh, yet he was cleverly letting the intruder know of his infraction without being too confrontational.

Susan C.Young

It is unimpressive to speaking rudely to others. Often, all we need to do to ensure that we do not launch into a rude remark is to pause . . . breathe . . . and smile to ourselves before speaking.And when people are rude to you, just remember that they are revealing who they are, not who you are. Don’t take it personally. Sometimes being silent is your best response.

Susan C.Young

I am a very lucky lady that my life partner, Daniel, is a true-blue Southern gentleman. Watching him in action not only earns my love and respect, but it also strengthens his countenance and bolsters his reputation as a man. As a health care provider, he treats numerous patients who are elderly or in pain. Daniel has made it a customary ritual while people are in his care to help them with their coats, provide a stabilizing arm, carry the ladies’ purses, and even walk patients out to their cars. While this kindness provides extraordinary customer service, it also demonstrates that small acts of chivalry can make a significant impact on one’s reputation, first impression, and overall human-beingness.

Susan C.Young

A man worth his salt will treat a lady like a lady and make the effort to be a gentleman. While independent women are fully capable of being self-reliant, the majority whom I know appreciate being treated with respect, consideration, and chivalry. For the women who yearn for the old-fashioned, good-hearted, chivalrous guy, I promise, they do exist.

Susan C.Young

It is unimpressive to not return what’s been borrowed. Whether you have borrowed money, folding chairs, yard tools, or a popular book, always make sure you return to another person what is rightfully theirs. Lending it to you in the first place was a gift of trust and assistance. Being slow to give back in return may be considered rude.

Susan C.Young

While you will certainly attract more bees with honey, there are times when being nice can backfire. Take it from a naturally kind person, being a “bitch” has its time and place. There will be times when you must engage with mean, rude, and inconsiderate people.

Susan C.Young

Being Nice Has Its Limitations. While you will certainly attract more bees with honey, there are times when being nice can backfire. Take it from a naturally kind person, being a “bitch” has its time and place. There will be times when you must engage with mean, rude, and inconsiderate people.

Susan C.Young

4 Times to Get Tough . . .1.tSelf-Respect—You don’t have to take everything on the chin and lose the respect of yourself and others in the process. Don’t be a doormat or a pushover by allowing people to disrespect or run over you. Stand firm in your beliefs and values.2.tSelf-Preservation—Understand and set boundaries. Decide what is and what is not acceptable in how people treat you. Claim your power to live life on your terms and not at the whims of others’ unreasonable requests and demands. 3.tProtecting others—If you are a parent of a child or a caretaker of the elderly or disabled, it is your moral duty to defend them to the end. 4.tSelf-Defense—Have you ever felt threatened, unsafe, or abused because of another’s behavior? Assert yourself and do whatever is necessary to ensure your safety. Being kind DOES NOT mean you should excuse such behavior.

Susan C.Young

Some people not only burn their bridges, but they also torch the town! With all their deeds of drama and destruction, they leave behind an aftermath of distrust, disrespect, and disappointment. And for what? This behavior creates immeasurable suffering in all directions. It ruins reputations and business deals, shatters lives—and closes doors which can never be re-opened. These repercussions can be prevented or avoided by simply BEING NICE.

Susan C.Young

Kindness is a powerful bridge builder which unifies teams, bonds friends, supports loved ones, and spreads goodwill. Tending to your bridges will fortify your relationships in such way that you will keep your invitations coming and your options open for future opportunities.

Susan C.Young

Whoever came up with the idea that "nice guys finish last" must have been either very jaded or downright malicious. Why would a caring, emotionally healthy human being ever think that being “un-nice” is a virtue? Anyone who wants to get ahead in life and have quality outcomes needs to understand that kindness is a strength. You will move forward faster by making friends rather than foes.

Susan C.Young

17 Ways to Just Be Nice“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” ―Aesop1.tBe sincere.2.tBe altruistic.3.tPractice patience.4.tInquire and engage.5.tKeep your promises.6.tOffer help to others.7.tAcknowledge others.8.tControl your behavior.9.tBe situationally aware.10.tBe polite and courteous.11.tUse considerate manners.12.tGreet people with a smile. 13.tPractice random acts of kindness.14.tShow respect for yourself and others.15.tBe complimentary and look for positives.16.tWalk in another’s shoes to understand their needs.17.tShare of yourself without expecting anything in return.

Susan C.Young

What is the motive behind your services? If it is self-centered, self-serving, and lacking consideration for others, then earning people’s trust, rapport, and business will inevitably be more of a struggle. A self-serving agenda throws up red flags which stop relationships dead in their tracks. It can destroy trust, make people wary of your intentions, and push customers to your competition.

Susan C.Young

However, if your agenda is truly to serve, your ROI (return on investment) will substantially expand. As we know from the "Law of Reciprocity," what you give is what you get. If you are helping people only to see what you can get out of it, your pie stays small and your opportunities stay limited. However, if you sincerely want to help people succeed, you will not only enjoy more success, but expand your possibilities beyond your expectations. Once you see the benefits from all directions, you will not want it any other way!

Susan C.Young

Service Beyond Self is Essential for Success Because It . . .•tBuilds credibility, trust, and customer satisfaction.•tStrengthens your personal reputation and public image.•tFosters goodwill and makes people feel appreciated.•tHelps you build healthy relationships with others.•tNurtures collaboration, participation, and cooperation.•tReaffirms a continuity of service for quality assurance, integrity, and reliability. •tSaves money—it costs less to keep existing customers than it does to create new ones. When you do it right the first time, you don’t have to fix it the next time.•tImproves communication and builds rapport.•tFosters mutual respect and understanding•tBy providing other people with what they want, you will get more of what you want!

Susan C.Young

To Move from Woe to Wow . . . Listen Attentively•tBe fully present and give your customer your full attention.•tStay calm and remain patient.•tDo not interrupt or become defensive.•tLet the customer express his or her concerns.•tNod your head and use affirming words to show that you are listening.•tRepeat back and empathize, when necessary. This confirms your understanding of the problem or question.

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, reduce uncertainty by being prepared. As Zig Ziglar once said, “Success happens when opportunity meets preparation.” Preparing well for potential outcomes will provide you with a safety net if there is a hiccup, glitch, or temporary setback.

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, practice, practice, practice. Each time you test your bravery you grow your self-assurance and increase your comfort to a greater degree. Repetition helps build confidence and competence. You did it; now do it again!

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, Do It Scared. Being scared is a precursor to bravery, otherwise, it wouldn’t be bravery, would it? Mustering the courage to stretch beyond your familiar territory is a rewarding act in itself.

Susan C.Young

To cultivate bravery and courage, may the Force be with you. Whether you fortify yourself with a positive mental attitude, affirmations, faith in God, prayer, and meditation, or an innate sense of personal destiny, you have the power to summon your courage and be brave. “Make it so, Number One!

Susan C.Young

And as is often the case, the people who would benefit the most from reading a book like this are the ones least likely to buy and read it. For you, however, this chapter will serve as a sterling reminder to make your manners shine.

Susan C.Young

You already know the difference between being a gracious person versus a rude one.

Susan C.Young

Impeccable manners and courteous behavior are the hallmarks for healthy relations and human interaction.

Susan C.Young

Polite people tend to be more respected, admired, and appreciated than their rude counterparts.

Susan C.Young

Your manners are critical for both making a positive first impression and creating success in life, love, and business.

Susan C.Young

Without civilized social graces, not only is life more difficult, but a positive first impression can be destroyed as fast as it is made.

Susan C.Young

While good old-fashioned manners and etiquette have worked for centuries, new standards and expectations have come into play with the modern world. Behaviors which would have been appalling in the past are now socially acceptable.

Susan C.Young

Regardless of the trends we see in the deterioration of morality, respect, and values, wise people will still strive to take the high road to rise above the ever-increasing rudeness and stand apart from the crowd.

Susan C.Young

I remember hearing years ago about a centenarian being interviewed on her birthday. She was asked, “Throughout your life, you have witnessed amazing change and innovation. The past one-hundred years have brought the inventions of the car, television, air conditioning, and microwave ovens. What is the most extraordinary change you have seen in your lifetime?” Without missing a beat, she replied, “That a teenager can say “suck” in front of their parents and get away with it!” While cultural norms may have changed with the times, being considerate of fellow human beings is not an antiquated notion; its time hasn't ended. Quite the opposite is true. In our world today, kindness and politeness are needed more than ever.

Susan C.Young

The elegance of etiquette is a timeless expression of class which transcends social status, demographics, educational level, and ethnicity. Good manners say more about you than the person who is on the receiving end.

Susan C.Young

Take the initiative with deliberate steps to be a polite person:1.tCover your mouth when you cough or sneeze.2.tReciprocate a thoughtful word or a good deed in kind.3.tSay "excuse me" when you bump into someone, unintentionally violate someone’s space, or need to get someone’s attention.4.tApologize when you’ve made a mistake or are in the wrong.5.tLive by the "Golden Rule" and treat others the way you would like to be treated.6.tWhen dining at home or in a restaurant, wait until everyone is served before eating your meal.7.tAcknowledge notable events like birthdays, weddings, and anniversaries.8.tReply to invitations, regardless of whether you will be able to attend. 9.tAcknowledge and show gratitude for gifts and gestures of hospitality.10.tPut things back where they belong. Leave the world a better place than how you found it.

Susan C.Young

To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . take the time to mine the gold.Actively seek the goodness in others then express your gratitude for it. Excavate the dirt, seek the treasure, and polish their gold to shine boldly and brightly. People will rise to your positive expectations and belief in them.

Susan C.Young

To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Say something nice!My wise mother raised us with the philosophy that if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. That is a Southern custom if there ever was one! It is easy to find fault, criticize, condemn, and complain—but none of these behaviors will help you enjoy positive relationship results.

Susan C.Young

To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Catch people doing things right:Outstanding leaders know that people will be more engaged, perform at higher levels, and be more loyal when they are appreciated and celebrated. Jeff West, international speaker and author of The Unexpected Tour Guide, shares that “People will jump over high hurdles, fight fires and break through walls for leaders who find them doing things right. Building that kind of chemistry is essential if a team is going to jell.” Capitalize on the opportunity to notice what people are doing right at work and at home and they will deliver their best. As the old saying goes, “A person who feels appreciated will always do more than expected.

Susan C.Young

To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Make a list of positives:Whether you would like to nurture a healthy relationship or improve a toxic one, make a list of positives which you admire about the other person. Begin by identifying, acknowledging, and focusing on their good qualities. Your perspective and how you feel about the person will begin to shift. You will find it much easier to polish the gold from a perspective of gratitude and appreciation.

Susan C.Young

To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Flip your positivity switch:What is your first instinct? If you are quick to find fault, look for the negative, or complain about another person, knock it off! It makes you less fun to be around. When you feel those negative thoughts and judgments coming in, catch yourself and STOP!

Susan C.Young

To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Brag about their accomplishments in front of others:For years, I have shared that the definition of a good friend is someone who says nice things about you behind your back. And the definition of a GREAT friend is someone who says GREAT things to others in front of you. One of the kindest things a husband or wife can do for their relationships is to brag about their partner’s qualities to other people.

Susan C.Young

To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Focus on the Positives:Focusing on the positives will get you further in business and further in life. Whatever you focus on will expand. If you focus on what you do not like about another person, they will become so intolerable to you that you cannot bear to be around them. However, if you focus on their positives and can find something redeeming, regardless of how small, the positivity needed to experience a more constructive interaction and relationship will manifest before your eyes.

Susan C.Young

To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Be complimentary:Find something positive to say to compliment another person. Whether they are being a great parent, dressing nicely, maintaining a gorgeous yard, or winning a recent 5K run, pick something to acknowledge which is noteworthy.

Susan C.Young

To Polish the Gold & Help Others Shine . . . Acknowledge their achievements:Great achievements require great effort and usually come dressed as hard work. Move beyond merely recognizing the achievement and express admiration for the effort it took to get there.

Susan C.Young

All compliments are not created equal. Some may change the trajectory of a person’s life, while others fall on deaf ears. Is it well deserved or earned? People will remember you fondly when you have affirmed them in a positive way. Paying compliments creates good will, happy moments, and makes you more likable in return.

Susan C.Young

What are the key elements for a fabulous, well-delivered compliment? You . . .•tare sincere and genuine.•tgive it freely without expecting anything in return. Your compliment is a selfless gift, not a boomerang.•tare specific and detailed.•telaborate on why you like something.•tdescribe how their positive virtue has positively impacted you.•tcan use adjectives for more colorful descriptions.•tkeep it positive.•tsay it like you mean it with intentional impact.•tuse discretion and good judgment.•tleave no room for misinterpretation or misunderstanding.•tsay the right thing at the right moment and let it flow organically.Finding sincere ways to compliment others is a powerful way to make a great first and last impression.

Susan C.Young

UN-Impressive ‘Compliments’ . . .•tWhen compliments are used as a passive-aggressive way to manipulate others for personal gain.•tDelivering a back-handed compliment which makes others feel bad.•tDishonesty—you say it but really do not mean it.•tFalse bravado.•tManufacturing the moment for your ulterior motives.•tPandering to win affection, a vote, or approval.•tExaggerating and being over-zealous.•tBeing hypocritical.•tExpressing preferential treatment or making an unfair comparison.•tWhen it draws attention to a person’s weakness, disabilities, or shortcomings.•tWhen it is inappropriate and off-color.

Susan C.Young

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Relationship Quotes - Page 5

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