Quotes by Playwrights - Page 193

Why are they going to disappear him?'I don't know.'It doesn't make sense. It isn't even good grammar.
Joseph Heller
Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit.
William Shakespeare
Artemis: (shocked) Why, Doctor? This is a sensitive area. For all you know I could be suffering from depression. Doctor Po: I suppose you could. Is that the case? Artemis: (head in hands) It's my mother, Doctor. Doctor Po: Yes? Artemis: My mother, she... Doctor Po: Your mother, yes? Artemis: She forces me to endure this ridiculous therapy when the school's so-called counsellors are little better than misguided do-gooders with degrees.
Eoin Colfer
We're being lead by an idiot with a crayon.
Eoin Colfer
Foaly: Anyone see you come in here? Holly: The FBI, CIA, NSA, DEA, MI6. Oh, and the EIB. Foaly: The EIB? Holly: (smirking) Everyone in the building.
Eoin Colfer
I might have known,” said Eeyore. “After all, one can’t complain. I have my friends. Somebody spoke to me only yesterday. And was it last week or the week before that Rabbit bumped into me and said ‘Bother!’. The Social Round. Always something going on.
A.A. Milne
I don't like lollipops.
Eoin Colfer
Getting married is like trading in the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one.
Mae West
This calls for a very special blend of psychology and extreme violence.
Ben Elton
Well, I have lost you; and I lost you fairly;In my own way, and with my full consent.Say what you will, kings in a tumbrel rarelyWent to their deaths more proud than this one went.Some nights of apprehension and hot weepingI will confess; but that's permitted me;Day dried my eyes; I was not one for keepingRubbed in a cage a wing that would be free.If I had loved you less or played you slylyI might have held you for a summer more,But at the cost of words I value highly,And no such summer as the one before.Should I outlive this anguish, and men do,I shall have only good to say of you.
Edna St. Vincent Millay
I’m an atheist and I thank God for it.
George Bernard Shaw
Pooh," said Rabbit kindly, "you haven't any brain." "I know," said Pooh humbly.
A.A. Milne
Who are you?" he asked.I am the future queen of this world, at the very least. You may refer to me as Mistress Koboi for the next five minutes. After that you may refer to me as Aaaaarrrrgh, hold your throat, die screaming, and so on.
Eoin Colfer
The play was a great success, but audience was a dismal failure.
George Bernard Shaw
Money may not buy happiness, but I'd rather cry in a Jaguar than on a bus.
Françoise Sagan
Artemis felt like he was six again and caught hacking the school computers trying to make the test questions harder
Eoin Colfer
No matter what dimension you're in, there's a big-headed male trying to take over the world.
Eoin Colfer
We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie.
David Mamet
He who hesitates is a damned fool.
Mae West
I can't go on, I'll go on.
Samuel Beckett
A bear, however hard he tries, grows tubby without exercise.
A.A. Milne
A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.
George Bernard Shaw
My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world.
George Bernard Shaw
Think, think, think.
A.A. Milne
A great nose may be an indexOf a great soul
Edmond Rostand
There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified that a concern for one's safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind. Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to. Yossarian was moved very deeply by the absolute simplicity of this clause of Catch-22 and let out a respectful whistle."That's some catch, that Catch-22," he observed."It's the best there is," Doc Daneeka agreed.
Joseph Heller
Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no fibs.
Oliver Goldsmith
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
Mae West
If you were me, then I'd be you, and if I were you, then I'd hide somewhere far away.
Eoin Colfer
Rabbit's clever," said Pooh thoughtfully."Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever.""And he has Brain.""Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit has Brain."There was a long silence."I suppose," said Pooh, "that that's why he never understands anything.
A.A. Milne
When in danger or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.
Herman Wouk
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.
George Bernard Shaw
Oh Tigger, where are your manners?""I don’t know, but I bet they’re having more fun than I am.
A.A. Milne
It's snowing still," said Eeyore gloomily."So it is.""And freezing.""Is it?""Yes," said Eeyore. "However," he said, brightening up a little, "we haven't had an earthquake lately.
A.A. Milne
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
Joseph Heller
It takes a lot of time to be a genius. You have to sit around so much, doing nothing, really doing nothing.
Gertrude Stein
It's like learning to ride a unicorn. You never forget.
Eoin Colfer
Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
Mae West
I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.
Mae West
Confidence is ignorance. If you're feeling cocky, it's because there's something you don't know.
Eoin Colfer
Animals are my friends...and I don't eat my friends.
George Bernard Shaw
The longer and more carefully we look at a funny story, the sadder it becomes.
Nikolai Gogol
Finally, from so little sleeping and so much reading, his brain dried up and he went completely out of his mind.
Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra
I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
Mae West
Have you ever noticed how ‘What the hell’ is always the right decision to make?
Terry Johnson
Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
Tom Stoppard
When a good man is hurt, all who would be called good must suffer with him.
Euripides
But as I have noticed on more than one occaision, life itself is unfair, and there is no complaint department, so we might as well accept things the way they happen, clean up the mess, and move on.
Jeff Lindsay
On Wednesday, when the sky is blue,and I have nothing else to do,I sometimes wonder if it's true That who is what and what is who." - Winnie-the-Pooh
A.A. Milne
Music, my rampart and my only one.
Edna St. Vincent Millay
Anxiety is the handmaiden of creativity
T.S Eliot
Make voyages. Attempt them. There's nothing else.
Tennessee Williams
When we lose one we love, our bitterest tears are called forth by the memory of hours when we loved not enough.
Maurice Maeterlinck
It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or time or fortune, but just yourself that kept things from you.
Lillian Hellman
To save all we must risk all.
Friedrich Schiller
I never loved another person the way I loved myself.
Mae West
For the future, the motto is, "No days unalert.
Robert Greene
when you're cool for twenty,you get paid for twenty-one.
Miguel Piñero
You will write if you will write without thinking of the result in terms of a result, but think of the writing in terms of discovery, which is to say that creation must take place between the pen and the paper, not before in a thought or afterwards in a recasting... It will come if it is there and if you will let it come.
Gertrude Stein
We had the experience but missed the meaning. And approach to the meaning restores the experience in a different form.
T.S Eliot