Dave Barry Quotes

Oh, I'm not saying that alcohol is perfect. It has caused its share of problems. Russia is only one example.

Dave Barry

There's nothing wrong with enjoying looking at the surface of the ocean itself, except that when you finally see what goes on underwater,you realize that you've been missing the whole point of the ocean. Staying on the surface all the time is like going to the circus and staring at the outside of the tent.

Dave Barry

Call me a proud American, if you want, but I truly believe that no other nation on Earth possesses the capabilities to put on a more powerful display of underwater mermaid patriotism.

Dave Barry

There comes a time in a man's life when he hears the call of the sea. If the man has a brain in his head, he will hang up the phone immediately.

Dave Barry

You should not confuse your career with your life.

Dave Barry

In the words of a very famous dead person, 'A nation that does not know its history is doomed to do poorly on the Scholastic Aptitude Test.

Dave Barry

In the words of a very famous dead person, 'A nation that does not know its history is doomed to do poorly on the Scholastic Aptitude Test.

Dave Barry

maybe somebody finally shot the dog.

Dave Barry

maybe somebody finally shot the dog.

Dave Barry

We don't shoot somebody soon, I'm gonna forget how

Dave Barry

If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry.

Dave Barry