Uncategorized Quotes - Page 71

When one is too old for love, one finds great comfort in good dinners.

They put me in a holding cell with a black kid and a white kid and a Chinese kid. We're the United Nations of juvenile delinquents.

Sherman Alexie

So here's my theory, and this is such crap science, I don't have to tell you. It's science without microscopes, blood tests, or reality.

Maggie Stiefvater

In Russia, as I sat there day after day wearing headphones, listening to the interpreter struggle to make our words relevant, I wondered if we could establish meaningful rapport with a nation that had never seen raisins dance in dark glasses on TV...never had a garage sale.

Erma Bombeck

[Mrs. Allen was] never satisfied with the day unless she spent the chief of it by the side of Mrs. Thorpe, in what they called conversation, but in which there was scarcely ever any exchange of opinion, and not often any resemblance of subject, for Mrs. Thorpe talked chiefly of her children, and Mrs. Allen of her gowns.

Jane Austen

I have a theory about pink pastry boxes. So much joy comes from those boxes. When someone walks into a room with a pink pastry box, joy immediately fills the room. World peace? Three words. Pink pastry box. I get a big cup of coffee and finalize my plans for world domination.

Liza Palmer

When I left high school with my diploma, it felt like I was holding a key that would unlock the door to a better world. Every teacher I passed on my way down to the parking lot—the ones who suspended me for questioning them both earnestly and in jest, suspended me for using a contumacious hip-shake as my hallway gait, suspended me for me being me—the ones who would roll their eyes if my behavior was, on the whole, unpatriotic, unjustified, and immature—well, on the way down that long black declivity, their faces seemed so contorted as if lurking shadows had vice grips locked on their kidneys, wrenching it every time a teacher didn't want to remain upright and respectful. Yes, they didn’t want to me to succeed either! I pledge allegiance to the flag that united every authority in that indefensible school looked at me, even treated me, as if I was a terrorist, or at the very least, unpatriotic. But God—didn’t the red blood, white skin, and blue balls that flagged my physical existence suffice for me to have a little liberty and justice?

Brian Celio

Worry:Interest paid on trouble before it falls due.

Dean Ing

Skulduggery stood among the ruins of what had once been a sofa. Valkyrie raised an ey

Derek Landy

I find it rude to laugh at a man with a sword.

Derek Landy

But I'm really enjoying my retirement. I get to sleep in every day. I do crossword puzzles and eat cake.

Derek Landy

Can you imagine life without the horror genre? There would be no monsters. Only a**holes.

Michael A. Arnzen

She spoke under her breath to Nick. "Is there a reason he's only wearing one sock?" "He puked on his foot." "Oh." She turned back to Huxley. "Can we get you another sock? Maybe a blanket or something?

Julie James

Oh good Lord. She definitely hadn't put on enough deodorant for this.

Jill Shalvis

Seedy wasn't a fair description for the place, because seeds imply eventual regrowth and renewal.

Jim Butcher

Didn't anyone tell you that size doesn't matter?""Yes, but I told him to put his pants back on and go home.

Christine Warren

Generally speaking, I try not to generalize.

Addison C. Arthur

What do they say about meeting a bear in the woods? Oh right, you shouldn't. And to make sure you don't, you should make a lot of noise so that they'll will know where you are and keep their distance because, supposedly, they're as nervous of us as we are of them. Which is all goo, except this bear doesn't seem the least bit nervous. He's giving me a look like I'm Goldilocks, ate his porridge, broke his chair, slept in his bed, and now it's payback time."- Widdershins

Charles de Lint

Leandros's favorite place had turned out not to be vegetarian, but vegan, which was for people who preferred their suicide slow.

Rob Thurman

I had refused Emerson's well-meant offers of assistance, knowing his efforts would be confined to moving the furniture to the wrong places and demanding how much longer the process would take.

Elizabeth Peters

...as nervous as a bird in a coal mine.

Jim Butcher

You got off on the wrong foot. I merely watched you shove it into your mouth.

Sabrina Jeffries

Oh hell. They've got Mrs B in a bag!

L.J. Smith

When you by nature subscribe to the view that everyone except yourself is a berk or a wanker, it is hard to bond with anybody in any rational common cause.

Lynne Truss

Meaning 'by way of the anus'. 'Per Annum', with two n's, means 'yearly'. The correct answer to the question, 'What is the birthrate per anum?' is zero (one hopes).

Mary Roach

Where did you get that assault weapon?""Assault weapon?" Zach turned his head to look at her. "Well, lookey there. You're cute when you blush."Maddie's face grew hotter, but at least he'd mistaken the reason for her embarrassment.Zach turned his face back toward the ceiling. "That there's standard equipment, darlin'.""There's nothing standard about that.""I didn't hear you complaining.""Of course not. You sprang it on me when I was mentally incompetent."Zach laughed out loud. "That you were, sweet Maddie that you were." Maddie and Zach

Suzie Quint

I would so rock at running amuck.

K.C. Randall

Nancy Herman, my new gym partner and locker neighbor, puts her hand on my shoulder and whispers, "Don't worry April. I have foot fungus too.

Amy Holder

I leave it to be settled, by whomsoever it may concern, whether the tendency of this work be altogether to recommend parental tyranny, or reward filial disobedience.

Jane Austen

Speaking of tongues, they are the main reason I'm a nervous wreck. Ryan is a senior and well, sadly, I'm not all that experienced with boys. I mean, I'm a freshman and have been to dances with boys my age and even have gone out with boys, but I've never really kissed them. Not like I hope to kiss Ryan anyway. Bobby Robinson did shove his tongue into my mouth one time, when we were kissing under the bleachers at a football game, but it didn't feel so good. I'm pretty sure he didn't have it exactly right. So I talked to my friends, Katie and Lisa, about how to properly make out. But, well, here is just a bit of their unhelpful advice.Just let him take the lead, do what ever he does.Um, couldn't that get me into a lot of trouble?Just sort of kiss his tongue, but try not to drool.Don't open your mouth too wide.And then, just open your mouth wide.See?Stupid, conflicting information.And this from girls who supposedly know how to do this!I feel like I'm an undercover CIA agent trying to wrestle vital information out of a ruthless double agent, and the fate of the free world depends upon it. All the while, the President is yelling at me in a panic, saying, Somebody! Anybody! Just get me the truth!

Jillian Dodd

She’s a serial kisser. I think her parents are French.

C.C. Hunter

Damn, Marcus, how much have you been working out? You have the ass of a god.He turned to face her, and naturally her gaze fell to his jewels. She shook her head and sighed. You warriors are so fucking hung and I really do need a man.

Caris Roane

Y'ever notice how you never seem to get laid on Thanksgiving? I think it's because all the coats are on the bed.

George Carlin

In her small voice, Persephone said, "I have nothing to add." After a moment of consideration, she added, however, "If you are going to punch someone, don't put your thumb inside your fist. It would be a shame to break it.

Maggie Stiefvater

Ease off the martyr throttle.

Jim Butcher

I'm sorry, but you just can't fit fabulous into a backpack.

Samantha Sotto

You can't beat me. I have the mind of a warlock with adonis DNA. Winning!

Charlie Sheen

Once upon a time, there was a little creature that was rather small and rather wicked and it lived all alone in the woods. The little creature lived in a little den, at the bottom of a little ravine, filled with not-at-all little brambles and on the edge of a forest that could only be described as really freakin' huge.

Ursula Vernon

Sergeant Colon owed thirty years of happy marriage to the fact that Mrs. Colon worked all day and Sargent Colon worked all night. They communicated by means of notes. They had three grown-up children, all born, Vimes had assumed, as a result of extremely persuasive handwriting.

Terry Pratchett

Could it be? Samantha Kingston? Home? On a Friday?” I roll my eyes. “I don’t know. Did you do a lot of acid in the sixties? Could be a flashback.” “I was two years old in 1960. I came too late for the party.” He leans down and pecks me on the head. I pull away out of habit. “And I’m not even going to ask how you know about acid flashbacks.” “What’s an acid flashback?” Izzy crows. “Nothing,” my dad and I say at the same time, and he smiles at me.

Lauren Oliver

A cupcake temple?' Her chest still tight with anxiety, Bertie forced herself to imagine it: bricks of pound cake mortared with buttercream and chocolate ganache, torches like striped birthday candles set into the walls, pilgrims upon the Path of Delectable Righteousness delivering daily tributes of almond paste and raspberry filling. . . .

Lisa Mantchev

You know, there are several gay men on the faculty. Professor Montag makes jelly beans look colorless(...)

Tara Lain

Knowledge may be power, but half of what I know I wish I could forget.

Carroll Bryant

Throughout life try to remember...to always keep your head up high and your middle finger higher!

Timothy Pina

It would take more than long-stemmed roses to change my view that you're a despicable cowardy custard and a disgrace to a proud family. Your ancestors fought in the Crusades and were often mentioned in despatches, and you cringe like a salted snail at the thought of appearing as Santa Claus before an audience of charming children who wouldn't hurt a fly. It's enough to make an aunt turn her face to the wall and give up the struggle.

P.G. Wodehouse

He dragged me back - just in time. A tree had crashed down on to the side walk, just missing us. Poirot stared at it, pale and upset. "It was a near thing that! But clumsy, all the same - for I had no suspicion - at least hardly any suspicion. Yes, but for my quick eyes, the eyes of a cat, Hercule Poirot might now be crushed out of existence - a terrible calamity for the world. And you, too, mon ami - though that would not be such a national catastrophe." "Thank you," I said coldly.

Agatha Christie

When does he ever think?" Richard straddled a chair and accepted a wind cup from Raoul. "If he were to sell his brain, he could claim it had never been used.", Chapter 7

Sharon Kay Penman

Once I got home, though, and saw several packages on my front porch, all the crap from the day disappeared. A few had smiley faces on them. Squealing, I grabbed the boxes. Books were inside-- new release books I'd preordered weeks ago.

Jennifer L. Armentrout

I need some kind of... like... last minute, poorly-set-up deus ex machina!!

Bryan Lee O'Malley

Steampunk is nothing more than what happens when Goths discover brown.

Charles Stross

Being here? With you? I've met my subconscious, and he's not that sick.

Jim Butcher

Tanner: I think that I might kiss you to keep your lips busy with something other than insulting me.Ella: If you think you can do it without getting lost.

Melissa Lemon

Billy squinted at me. "Why are you letting them go?""Because they're real.""How do you know?""The one I was holding crapped on my hand.

Jim Butcher

literally: This word should be deleted. All too often, actions described as “literally” did not happen at all. As in, “He literally jumped out of his skin.” No, he did not. Though if he literally had, I’d suggest raising the element and proposing the piece for page one. Inserting “literally” willy-nilly reinforces the notion that breathless nitwits lurk within this newsroom. Eliminate on sight—the usage, not the nitwits. The nitwits are to be captured

Tom Rachman

Damon Scares me,' Maggie said. 'Maybe you should do what he wants.''Can't.''Why not?''Because he killed me. That kind of pisses me off

D.J. MacHale

oh, my God," I whispered. "But how did they get my photo?Alex tapped his mouth with his thumb. "That ...book with everyone's picture in it, that you have in high school.""Yearbook," I said. Was he trying to be funny? But of course he was right; that's exactly where it was from.

l.a weatherly

The nursery rhyme ends when a spider comes along and frightens Miss Muffet straight off her tuffet. I have wondered about what kind of lesson this is for a young girl. If you're eating your curds and whey and a spider comes along, I don't think there's anything wrong with picking up a newspaper, smashing it, and going back to your breakfast.

Sloane Crosley

Today I feel like I did tomorrow.

Carroll Bryant

Look at you, all Rocky Horror Picture Ho.

Michelle Rowen

Smoking will probably kill me, but so will natural selection.

Carroll Bryant

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Uncategorized Quotes - Page 71

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