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That’s cool, Leo.” Johnson was damn near standing on top of him as he spoke, but he’d be damned if he was going to back up.“So just talking would be nice…would you like to come over to my place tonight for a glass of wine?”“Not even if Jesus was pouring it,” Day responded quickly. He heard God let out a loud laugh and it made him turn up the corner of his mouth at the sound of it. God rarely laughed—hell the man rarely smiled—but somehow, Day could make him do both.
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Fuck you. I know Day is just showing off for you.” Johnson turned back to look at Day. “I’ll be sure to catch you when you’re alone.”“I’ll be sure to have my rape whistle,” Day retorted
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God came up and kissed Day on his forehead. When Day looked over at Johnson, who was still slowly sipping his soda, the guy did look lonely as hell. Before Day could say something kind, his other headache strolled in.“Oh hell. What the fuck is going on in here? This must be the officer’s gay alliance club meeting.”Day blew an exasperated breath. “And now that you’re here, Ronowski, all members are present and we can begin.”Day smiled as God and Johnson practically spit their drinks out laughing.Ronowski fumed. “Day, you’re going to stop calling me gay! I have never been gay! I will never be gay, and I don’t like anyone that is gay! So stop saying that before people start believing your bullshit!”Day clapped his hands together once. “Okay everyone those are the notes from last week’s meeting, now on to new business.” Day leveled Ronowski with a stern glare. “Ronowski, you are gay, man. You’re tightly closeted. But you are indeed gay, ultra-gay. You’re fuckin’ Marvin Gay. You crash landed on Earth when your gay planet exploded.” Day moved away from God and stood in front of an openmouthed Ronowski. “Come out of the closet already. It’s so bright and wonderful out here. Dude, I’ve seen Brokeback Mountain too, don’t believe that bullshit. No one cares who you fuck…ya know…like you tell me every. Single. Day. Of. My. Life,” Day said exaggeratedly.He stepped in so close to Ronowski that he could smell the body wash he used.“Let a man bang your back out one time.” Day leaned in to the man’s ear and felt Ronowski’s body give a fierce shutter. “I mean pound your ass so hard that you can’t walk straight for a week, and I guarantee you, you’ll want to march in the next gay pride parade, wearing nothing but a glitter jockstrap and a fuckin’ hot-pink feather boa.” Day stepped back and saw the beads of sweat that had popped up on Ronowski’s forehead. Satisfied he’d proven his point he refilled his coffee and left the break room.
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So are you going to tell me why Ronowski pulled you into the break room when we got back today?” God asked watching Day closely.Day shook his head at him, smiling wickedly. “It was about sex.”“No fucking way. He came to you about sex?” God said, not hiding his shock.“Who else is he going to ask…his priest?” Day said and quickly dodged the piece of garlic bread God threw at his head.“Do I want to know?” God said.“It wasn’t too bad. He wanted to know the best way to pleasure Johnson.” Day laughed when God balled up his face and made a gagging sound.“There intimacy has been pretty one-sided from what I could understand. Ro was still pretty shy about telling me stuff, so I was mostly guessing.” Day wiped his mouth with his napkin before continuing. “Being the stud that I am…I gave the kid a few pointers.”“Stud, huh?” God smiled.“Yeah. I don’t mind taking the little tike under my homosexual wing and showing him how to fly.” Day grinned.“You’re twisted. And isn’t Ro like the same age as you,” God said.Day blew an exasperated breath. “Regardless of age, Cash. I have more experience. Way more. Way, way, way more experience with fucking men than anyone I—”“I fucking got it, Leo.” God scowled at him.Day laughed hysterically. “I told him all about how I make you scream my name every night.” Day chuckled and bolted up from his chair when God took off after him. Day ran back into the kitchen, jumping and gliding across the kitchen island on his hip and racing into the den. God was hot on his heels.“I’ll catch you, you quick little bastard. And when I do, I’m going to show you just how loud I can make you scream,” God said in his sexy rough-hewn voice.“Oh fuck.”Day was laughing so hard he could barely just keep out of God’s grip. He dodged him in the living room, leaping over the coffee table heading fast toward the stairs when he was caught around his waist with a strong arm and dragged back down the two steps he’d cleared.
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Day’s thoughts were interrupted when Detective Johnson strolled into the conference room and announced proudly, “Detective Day, you are going to love me, handsome.”“Oh yeah, you finally got me that date with Channing Tatum?” Day quipped.Day heard God huff with annoyance, not bothering to turn around and face them.
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Do me a favor, Ro,” Day said calmly.“What’s that?” Ronowski peeked around Johnson again.“Johnson won’t be with you all the time. Remind me to kick your ass later,” Day said.Ronowski came to stand in front of Day, looked at his watch and smirked. “Sure, what time works for you?”Day looked at his watch too. “Uhhh, let’s see. How’s five thirty, is that good?”“I just remembered I’m busy at five thirty.”“So what time can you be there?”“I can do five thirty-five.”“Damn, that’s cutting it close. I might be a little late, but wait on my ass whippin’.”“Will you dumb asses shut up? Lord help us…they’ve bonded.” The captain tried to suppress his laugh. “God, how the hell do you put up with Day’s mouth?”“I got something that’ll make him shut him up,” God said in a deep voice.Everyone groaned and scrunched their faces up in disgust.“We don’t want to hear that shit, God. Ugh,” the captain said while pouring his cup of coffee.God looked at Day and saw he wasn’t the slightest bit fazed and if he knew his lover—which he most certainly did—Day would not let him get the last word.“It’s all a mind game that I play with God. He thinks he’s shutting me up…but when he’s finished with my mouth…I start talking again.” Day winked.“I’m leaving. I should write your asses up for inappropriate conduct in front of a superior.” The captain hauled ass out of the room.Johnson and Ronowski were shaking their heads too and telling Day “he sure knew how to clear a room.”“I got to get back across town,” Johnson said and bent down and whispered something in Ronowski’s ear that made the man turn red.God tried to pull Day away but he refused to budge. When Johnson said good-bye to them and left out the room, Day mock whispered to Ronowski. “I told you. One good pounding is all you—”“For fucks sake, Leo,” Ronowski groaned, grabbing his soda hightailing it out of there before Day could finish his sentence.
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Language is the dress of thought.
Samuel Johnson
That’s sweet. Nice of you.” Johnson put his hands in his pockets. Dove couldn’t help but wonder if he was massaging a sore bag of testicles. Dove looked around, and Johnson shuffled his feet. It seemed neither knew what to say, but she hoped neither wanted to part ways either. Johnson’s default was always medical. “How’s your infection?” Die. Die. Kill me. “It’s… cleared up… nicely.” Dove twisted her hand into her hair.
Debra Anastasia
Oh God. We’re talking about me being naked, in the shower with cooter cream. Please world, end. Kill me. “I know it’s not soap. I just… if it’s scented… I can’t do scented. Flowers and stuff like that. Fruit-flavored soaps make… things… burnish.” She could tell from the peeks at his face Mr. Fitzwell had never stepped foot in bath and lotion store, wanting to try the array of fun fragrances. Nor had he purchased Peppermint Candy shower gel, foamed up his nether regions, and felt like he had dipped them in lava. Dove crossed and uncrossed her legs at the memory. Mr. Fitzwell seemed concerned. “Okay, just a heads-up. It’s definitely not good to put any fruits or plant life near your genitals.” He made a V with his hands and formed his own pretend vagina in front of his pants. Dove covered her eyes and tried to defend herself because now she could hear the sickly older woman beating her supporters with a purse. Dove’s mumbling got louder with her embarrassment. “I don’t put weird things down… there. Just make sure that the cream’s vagina-scented. Just plain. For vaginas.” She kept her eyes on the counter.
Debra Anastasia
When we were arguing on my twenty-fourth birthday, she left the kitchen, came back with a pistol, and fired it at me five times from right across the table. But she missed. It wasn't my life she was after. It was more. She wanted to eat my heart and be lost in the desert with what she'd done, she wanted to fall on her knees and give birth from it, she wanted to hurt me as only a child can be hurt by its mother.
Denis Johnson
Dove held out a hand to Johnson, and he took it—not because they were fleeing a fire and not because she was holding a million dollars. He took her hand to wrap his fingers around hers. His long, long fingers. Her knees went a little watery. Johnson placed a hand on her lower back to steady her. Her ass went a little watery. The trip up her stairs took longer than Ulysses on his epic journey. Johnson took the keys from her hand and opened her door.
Debra Anastasia
I know not why any one but a schoolboy in his declamation should whine over the Commonwealth of Rome, which grew great only by the misery of the rest of mankind. The Romans, like others, as soon as they grew rich, grew corrupt; and in their corruption sold the lives and freedoms of themselves, and of one another.
Samuel Johnson
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