Jenny Lawson Quotes

Refrigerators are good for keeping homemade moonshine less gross. Freezers are good for keeping rattlesnakes less angry. Garages are good to hide in when your wife finds either.

It's okay to keep a broken oven in your yard as long as you call it art.

We're better than Galileo. Because he's dead.

No. I can’t have sex with you today because there aren’t enough spoons.

Even the ugliest person's cellulite is more attractive than the most beautiful supermodel's lower intestine.' I'd put that on a T-shirt but probably Mark Twain already said it.