Humorous Quotes - Page 13

Adventuring turned out to be boring. Zach thought back to all the fantasy books he'd read where a team of questers traveled overland, and realized a few things. First he'd pictured himself with a loyal steed that would have done most of the walking, so he hadn't anticipated the blister forming on his left heel or the tiny pebble that seemed to have worked its way under his sock, so that even when he stripped off his sneaker he couldn't find it.He hadn't thought about how hot the sun would be either. When he put together his bunch of provisions, he never thought about bringing sunblock. Aragorn never wore sunblock. Taran never wore sunblock. Percy never wore sunblock. But despite all that precedent for going without, he was pretty sure his nose would be lobster-red the next time he looked in the mirror.He was thirsty, too, something that happened a lot in books, but his dry throat bothered him more than it had ever seemed to bother any character.And, unlike in books where random brigands and monsters jumped out just when things got unbearably dull, there was nothing to fight except for the clouds of gnats, several of which Zach was pretty sure he'd accidentally swallowed.

All kidding aside…” I focus back on Pyke, genuine sincerity in my tone.“Thank you…for everything. For dragging my ‘clueless ass’ through the ocean, andover hill and vale, when you knew it was futile and stupid—but that I’d still try to do it, with or without your help. Thanks for tracking me down when I was alone and helpless; and for giving me a voice when I thought all hope was lost—”“Ugh, for crying out loud…Enough already,” Pyke squirms, a nauseatedgrimace twisting his hairy face. “Now you’re going way overboard with thegratitude…That kind of gushy crap is meant to be dished out in small doses,” he gripes. “Please make it stop…before I have to snap my own neck, just to end the suffering.” He backs away into the crowd, giving Tristan’s shoulder one more slap with a sly wink. “Hurry up, Man, and do something. Kiss her, muzzle her…shove a sock in her mouth—

Closed head trauma is about as much fun as nude paintballing.

Anyway, it’s unthinkable! Dragons and knights are born enemies. They need to be enemies just like dogs hate cats, cats hate mice and mice hate scientists. Without somebody to hate where would all the hate go? The hate would just boil up inside you, eat away and cause you to have indigestion then a heart attack. We need to release the anger, and we release it on dragons who release it back on us. We slay them and they roast us. It is the natural order of things, Emma.

Memory is like a box of chocolates. They disappear quickly.

If we all learnt cat-speak, we would often find they are saying, “You stupid human, I am trying to tell you something important right now!

The day the Dragon chooses a male virgin instead of a female as his yearly sacrifice, the entire kingdom erupts into mass protests and anger.

Space: the gaping hole between land and other land.

Then perhaps you don’t need it. I think the scar gives you character, even if it does mar those pretty tattoos. Would make for great tavern stories if you didn’t cover it.” tNeferre laughed flatly and stuck her hands in her pockets. “There’s nothing great about getting mugged, Ziro.” tZiro laughed, her deep voice jiggling her second chin. “Oh, aye. But no one said you had to tell the truth now, did they?

Ash Gray

Return me safely to my home,” the princess said, “and I shall reward you with your weight in eggs.”tOlorun snorted derisively. “You’re joking, right?”tThe woman’s eyes flitted in embarrassment. t“Now wait a minute,” said Helianthus. “We’re talkin’ eggs here. What sort of eggs? Ostrich eggs?”tNeferre made an impatient noise. “Hel! She doesn’t have any eggs! Unless they’re hidden in a very . . . delicate place.” Neferre grinned at the princess. “Tell me your eggs are hidden where I think they’re hidden.

Ash Gray

Verily, for nine hundred years have I lost. Everyone I knew is dead, the empire gone, and who knows in what state the world is left. Should what thy sister reports prove true, much hath changed in the w

Michael J. Sullivan

Emma was doing something nice for Simon? Hell must be enjoying the snow day.

IF you want to be a winner than follow one simple rule and feed it in your mind. Take each task and work as " Do it yourself project.

Abhysheq Shukla

Sometimes life is like living in a chamber of Liquid Oxygen. Liquid don't allow you to live and Oxygen don't let you die.

Abhysheq Shukla

THE Biggest enemy of Truth is known as Facts in our Society

Abhysheq Shukla

A wise man is someone who knows how to convert obstacles into resources.

Abhysheq Shukla

For all those who say its a Man world. Respect Women Its their World we are just guest here

Abhysheq Shukla

MISUNDERSTANDING" arises only when you see the things with Closed Eyes

Abhysheq Shukla

The only difference between success and failure is Lack of Vision

Abhysheq Shukla

Life is same for everyone. The difference is only that some are living by heart and some for only sake of living

Abhysheq Shukla

Two powerful factors which creates difference between destroying your relationship and deepening it are EGO and Attitude

Abhysheq Shukla

TAKE Risk because you never know how absolutely perfect something could turn out to be..

Abhysheq Shukla

As long as we have MEMORIES, yesterday REMAINS and as long as we have HOPE, tomorrow AWAITS...

Abhysheq Shukla

YOU have to design your own Price tag for the world.

Abhysheq Shukla

Only Boiled Seeds are afraid of failure.

Abhysheq Shukla

No matter what goals you set to accomplish always remember there is a thing known as Life which you should never forget to live and enjoy

Abhysheq Shukla

Don’t be afraid of failures it takes courage to try new things & only those who try create miracles.

Abhysheq Shukla

If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future

Abhysheq Shukla

Live a life that leaves a memory, nobody can steal.

Abhysheq Shukla

If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present.

Abhysheq Shukla

The only unreachable dream is the one you don’t reach for.

Abhysheq Shukla

The thing about our choices is that after we have made them, they turn around and make us.

Abhysheq Shukla

True Relations never break and relation which breaks were never true

Abhysheq Shukla

Living your life is a task so difficult it has never been attempted before.

Abhysheq Shukla

What seems like the right thing to do could also be the hardest thing you have ever done in your life

Abhysheq Shukla

Always follow your dreams with confidence and conviction, don’t fall for the trap of dream killers

Abhysheq Shukla

Life is too short to be anything but happy. So kiss slowly. Love deeply. Forgive quickly. Take chances and never have regrets. Forget the past but remember what it taught you.

Abhysheq Shukla

Time change - Moments don't.

Abhysheq Shukla

Life is a do-it-yourself project.

Abhysheq Shukla

No body is a looser either he is a Winner or a Learner

Abhysheq Shukla

Being Wise & Being Smart are two different things anyone can be smart but those who master the art of knowing what to overlook in this journey called life deserves to be called Wise

Abhysheq Shukla

The only goal in life is to be happy, genuinely, intensely and consistently , regardless of what it looks like to others.

Abhysheq Shukla

Find answers in your weakness and surprise in your strength and always remember the golden rule every failure has HOPES

Abhysheq Shukla

The only principle of Success in Life :"You must be present to win.

Abhysheq Shukla

It’s all about “Priorities” There's No Such Thing as "Busy

Abhysheq Shukla

Don’t be afraid of failures it takes courage to try new things & only those who try create History.

Abhysheq Shukla

The only enemy which stands between the talent you posses and success you achieve is known as "EGO" in our Society

Abhysheq Shukla

The most important principle for self discovery and to taste success is rather than changing other's attitude changes your own. And always remember same sun which melts the butter also hardens the clay

Abhysheq Shukla

The only way to be content in life is to make sure your NEED don't become GREED.

Abhysheq Shukla

Theres no competition in DESTINY. Run your own RACE and wish others WELL!!!

Abhysheq Shukla

Have and show motivation to do and learn. That's the key for a good career. Everything else is an extrapolation of that.

Abhysheq Shukla

Pray GOD by HEART, Not by HABIT.

Abhysheq Shukla

To enjoy a peaceful & Beautiful Life We should open our 'EYE' and Close our 'I

Abhysheq Shukla

Start wherever you are! Low hanging fruit really tastes as good as the high stuff.

Abhysheq Shukla

A lie near to truth is always difficult to catch

Abhysheq Shukla

Smiling is not a choice It’s a Lifestyle Pass it on

Abhysheq Shukla

To be successful in life , Plan, Implement, Revise, Update, and Build on Change.

Abhysheq Shukla

Passion + Vision +Skill + Mentoring = Success.

Abhysheq Shukla

Love is the reflection of a broken heart in a shattered mirror...

Abhysheq Shukla

And now that I have been scammed once, I felt like it could not happen to me again.

Vann Chow

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