Funny But True Quotes

Some things are so silly they have a certain brilliance to them. Other things, set as standards for brilliance and therefore exalted by many who don't know why, become tarnished because of it.

Assuming what people want is about as controlled as using fireworks to start a fire.

I treat my thoughts like an old person treats their valuables: I cannot for the life of me proceed to throwing them out.

Look at the huge success of Fifty Shades of Grey. The girl in the book lets a rich guy beat her and ritually rape her, and she likes it! She finds it erotic! But imagine if Christian Grey wasn't a billionaire. Imagine if he lived in a dirty old trailer down by the river. Then that story wouldn't be a sexy romance novel, but an episode of CSI.

Be careful not to appear obsessively intellectual. When intelligence fills up, it overflows a parody.

When guys try to get a good job and make a lot of money, it's so that they can find a good mate, because they know women like guys with money. Big tits are to men, what big wallets are to women. A sexy woman can have almost any man she wants. And a rich guy can have almost any woman he wants.

Don't, but if at all, then, lie to the whole damn world - never to your own damn, silly stupid self.

Fakeer Ishavardas

To be a philosopher, just reverse everything you have ever been told...and have a sense of humor doing it.

Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions.