Comedians Quotes

There isn't a thing I can't do now that I didn't do when I was twenty-one...which gives you an idea of how pathetic I was when I was twenty-one. (That's a lie, but I might as well tell you something right here at the beginning of the book. Anytime I can get a laugh I'm not going to let the truth interfere with it.)

Comedy is a distortion of what is happening, and there will always be something happening.

We can’t all be comedians, some people have to do the laughing.

Mokokoma Mokhonoana

HECKLER: Say something funny!COMEDIAN: I don't do requests.

98% of all comedians feel obliged to be funny when interviewed. Less than 2% succeed.

Mokokoma Mokhonoana

This is the funniest book I’ve ever held in my hands. --Dave Barry, Pulitzer Prize winning humorist and author says about Radical Sabbatical

No small part of the club's audience consisted of would-be comics, as well as the leading comics of the day. In fact, there were so many gagsters around that it was difficult to know who was part of the act and who was just sitting in.

Kliph Nesteroff

I don’t think being a comedian gives you any fucking insight into what makes people laugh.

Are we not all actors playing parts in another person's play?

Shannon L. Alder

Finally, my watchers had to fess up. In embarrassed and genuinely polite tones, they said they had no other choice but to arrest me. Then they accompanied me to the prison across the way. As I entered, an extremely tall SS man leapt in front of me and asked: “Do you have any weapons?” “Why?” I responded. “Do I need any?

Comrades, we are going to try to cheer you up, and our sense of humor will help us in this endeavor, although the phrase gallows humor has never seemed so logical and appropriate. The external circumstances are exactly in our favor. We need only to take a look at the barbed wire fences, so high and full of electricity. Just like your expectations.And then there are the watchtowers that monitor our every move. The guards have machine guns. But machine guns won’t intimidate us, comrades. They just have barrels of guns, whereas we are going to have barrels of laughs.You may be surprised at how upbeat and cheerful we are. Well, comrades, there are goods reasons for this. It’s been a long time since we were in Berlin. But every time we appeared there, we felt very uneasy. We were afraid we’d get sent to the concentration camps. Now that fear is gone. We’re already here.

Comedians can turn laughter into tears and back again.

Anthony T.Hincks

Comedians can turn laughter into tears and back again.

Anthony T.Hincks

People who are not blessed with the ability to make others laugh compensate for that by saying (or trying to say) things that are profound.

Mokokoma Mokhonoana

I like video games, but they're really violent. I'd like to play a video game where you help the people who were shot in all the other games. It'd be called 'Really Busy Hospital.