Around the time my first marriage of twenty-one years was ending, I had spent a lot of time reflecting on the fairytale promises of living “happily ever after and being “forever in love.” I thought about how the expectations of our families, friends, religion and society each contribute to the guilt and shame many of us experience when our partnerships and marriages do not work out the way we expected. The familiar promises of being together until death do us part” seemed antiquated and misguided in our modern world. Why wan’t being happy, in love and committed ‘for now’ a more widely accepted and reasonable vision?

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