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Image of the quote is loading... SaveSave It's a wonder Hell don't open up and swallow her as the highlight of the service. - Quote by K. Martin Beckner

It’s a wonder Hell don’t open up and swallow her as the highlight of the service.

K. Martin Beckner
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People create all kind of fancy watches and clocks, never stopping to realize they're building monuments to the greatest of all thieves.
K. Martin Beckner
I wanted to go in and tell them that, but George thought it would just be stirring up some trouble, you know, stirring up the cow pile. A cow pile may looked dried up, but if you stir it up, it can start to stink again.
K. Martin Beckner
I hope you learn how to slow down and not let your life pass you by while you're watching the idiot box. Life's short, and one day you'll wake up and look in the mirror and realize you look like King Tut.
K. Martin Beckner
I could just hear my mom now, "You know those old candy cigarettes are bad for you. Next thing you know, you'll be drinking alcohol, and they'll find you dead in a ditch somewhere. I'll never be able to show my face in this town again.
K. Martin Beckner
That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard of. I think I would have more fun chopping thistles with a butter knife.
K. Martin Beckner
Stephanie took another puff from her candy cigarette, reached into her purse, brought out the rest of the pack, and said, "Want one of these damned cigarettes?
K. Martin Beckner
You'll never avoid every mistake. All you can do is try to do your best and live with the consequences.
K. Martin Beckner
Anyway," continued Mr. Miller, "when I was a kid, people used to sit under the stars at night and look up into the sky and talk about things. They got to know each other. People Today is too busy staring at the television, what I call the idiot box, to talk about anything. That's why there are so many divorces these days. People don't talk
K. Martin Beckner
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