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June is gone. For the first time, the enormity of that hits me. Every muscle aches, my heart most of all. I am throbbing with how much I miss her. It hurts worse than anything. I don’t know how I’m supposed to be expected to live day to day carrying this kind of pain. I don’t know how I’m supposed to go out there, spread her ashes, and let her go.I want to stop running away from everything.I want to find something to run toward.