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Speaking felt impossible, as contained and enclosed as she was, a longing that went on a loop, a longing for nothing at all.

Catherine Lacey

Speaking felt impossible, as contained and enclosed as she was, a longing that went on a loop, a longing for nothing at all.

Catherine Lacey
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She missed his nothing. It had felt like something.
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Maybe misery begins everywhere.
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Days are a finite resource and it's best to protect the ones you have.
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You will never be missing to yourself and all you can do is delay, delay, delay and the delaying must be good enough for you and you must find a way to be fine with the delay because it is your whole life and the minute you really go missing is the minute you can no longer miss.
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It depressed me to think that I might have been looking at another person but seeing only myself.
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And who is to say that loving a person isn’t just loving the idea of that person and not the actual person, all these incomprehensible clots of flesh with all their years gone by and vanished, all their history stored in basements even they cannot reach?
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Moments never stay, whether or not you ask them, they do not care, no moment cares, and the ones you wish could stretch out like a hammock for you to lie in, well, those moments leave the quickest and take everything good with them, little burglars, those moments, those hours, those days you loved the most.
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Though I knew I had the potential to do this locked in me like a poisonous pet snake, I knew I didn't have the part of a person you must have to turn that potential kinetic, to be the kind of person who can let their awful plow.
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