Quotes by Counselors

God is the greatest nurturer of all.
Eddie Capparucci
The man’s rights and the woman’s rights are the same size. They have the right to have their opinions and desires respected, to have a 50 percent say in decision making, to live free from verbal abuse and physical harm. Their children’s rights are somewhat smaller but substantial nonetheless; children can’t have an equal say in decisions because of their limited knowledge and experience, but they do have the right to live free from abuse and fear, to be treated with respect, and to have their voices heard on all issues that concern them.
Lundy Bancroft
I live now and only now and I will do what I want to do this moment and not what I decided was best for me yesterday.
Hugh Prather
Every moment that I am centered in the future I suffer a temporary loss of this life.
Hugh Prather
It's not that "today is the first day of the rest of my life " but that now is all there is of my life.
Hugh Prather
A woman of mystique is fully aware of her flaws and weaknesses yet she is strong enough to admit them and not be embarrassed by them.
Jean Lush
Lack of discipline leads to frustration and self-loathing.
Marie Chapian
Unless I accept my faults I will most certainly doubt my virtues.
Hugh Prather
It is enough that I am of value to somebody today.
Hugh Prather
To avail yourself of His certain wisdom ask of Him whatever questions you have. But do not entreat Him for that will never be necessary.
Hugh Prather
I like a man with faults especially when he knows it. To err is human- I'm uncomfortable around gods.
Hugh Prather
Perfectionism is slow death.
Hugh Prather
It is enough that I am of value to somebody today.
Hugh Prather
To avail yourself of His certain wisdom ask of Him whatever questions you have. But do not entreat Him for that will never be necessary.
Hugh Prather
I like a man with faults especially when he knows it. To err is human- I'm uncomfortable around gods.
Hugh Prather
Perfectionism is slow death.
Hugh Prather
It is enough that I am of value to somebody today.
Hugh Prather
When I have listened to my mistakes I have grown.
Hugh Prather
Just when I think I have learned the way to live life changes.
Hugh Prather
Boredom is useful to me when I notice it and think: Oh I'm bored there must be something else I want to be doing ... boredom acts as an initiator of originality by pushing me into new activities or new thoughts.
Hugh Prather
Real change isn't achieved as the result of white knuckling and hoping for the best. It requires changing your heart.
Eddie Capparucci
Next time I will ...""From now on I will ..."- What makes me think I am wiser today than I will be tomorrow?
Hugh Prather
He said if you do what you have to do today, all the tomorrows have a way of working things out by themselves.
Albert Borris
In the 1890s, when Freud was in the dawn of his career, he was struck by how many of his female patients were revealing childhood incest victimization to him. Freud concluded that child sexual abuse was one of the major causes of emotional disturbances in adult women and wrote a brilliant and humane paper called “The Aetiology of Hysteria.” However, rather than receiving acclaim from his colleagues for his ground-breaking insights, Freud met with scorn. He was ridiculed for believing that men of excellent reputation (most of his patients came from upstanding homes) could be perpetrators of incest.Within a few years, Freud buckled under this heavy pressure and recanted his conclusions. In their place he proposed the “Oedipus complex,” which became the foundation of modern psychology. According to this theory any young girl actually desires sexual contact with her father, because she wants to compete with her mother to be the most special person in his life. Freud used this construct to conclude that the episodes of incestuous abuse his clients had revealed to him had never taken place; they were simply fantasies of events the women had wished for when they were children and that the women had come to believe were real. This construct started a hundred-year history in the mental health field of blaming victims for the abuse perpetrated on them and outright discrediting of women’s and children’s reports of mistreatment by men.Once abuse was denied in this way, the stage was set for some psychologists to take the view that any violent or sexually exploitative behaviors that couldn’t be denied—because they were simply too obvious—should be considered mutually caused. Psychological literature is thus full of descriptions of young children who “seduce” adults into sexual encounters and of women whose “provocative” behavior causes men to become violent or sexually assaultive toward them.I wish I could say that these theories have long since lost their influence, but I can’t. A psychologist who is currently one of the most influential professionals nationally in the field of custody disputes writes that women provoke men’s violence by “resisting their control” or by “attempting to leave.” She promotes the Oedipus complex theory, including the claim that girls wish for sexual contact with their fathers. In her writing she makes the observation that young girls are often involved in “mutually seductive” relationships with their violent fathers, and it is on the basis of such “research” that some courts have set their protocols. The Freudian legacy thus remains strong.
Lundy Bancroft
Although I am far too frequently convinced otherwise, with God a dead-end is only the death of an end.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
When we see marriage as our sole purpose, we find ourselves with nowhere to go when we finally arrive.
Debra Fileta
Boredom or discontent is useful to me when I acknowledge it and see clearly my assumption that there's something else I would rather be doing. In this way boredom can act as an invitation to freedom by opening me to new options and thoughts. For example, if I can't change the activity, can I look at it more honestly?
Hugh Prather
God lures us into marriage through love and sex and loneliness, or simply the fact that someone finally paid attention - all those reasons that you got married in the first place. It doesn't really matter, he'll do whatever it takes. He lures us into marriage and then he uses it to transform us.
John Eldredge
To build refuges of my own making is to construct fortresses of sand at ocean’s edge, where the relentless tides of time will leave my most magnificently constructed walls as perfectly flat sand. And now that I am subject to the very tides that destroyed these walls of mine, I am left with the reality that my single and sole refuge can only be the God who created both tides and sand.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
I decry the injustice of my wounds, only to look down and see that I am holding a smoking gun in one hand and a fistful of ammunition in the other.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
The problem is not that we don’t recognize the truth when we hear it. The problem is that we don’t want to recognize what the truth might mean for us if we hear it.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Kicking the can down the road implies that we’re accepted the galling reality that whatever it is that we’ve avoiding, it’s something that’s not going to go away; at least on its own.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
One sure way I can avoid facing myself is by refusing to look into the face of God.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Avoidance is paying forward that which I would be much wiser to pay off.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
To be alone with myself in the space of silence is horrifying, for I know with the utmost certainty that in that space I will hear the very things that I constantly use the clamor to drown out. And so the question becomes, how long can I keep up all the noise?
Craig D. Lounsbrough
And we neglect the glorious gospel when we fail to recognize his preeminence. How frequently we forget that everything is for him and about him. We forget that he is to be first, in our honor and in our worship. Whenever the gospel slips from our conscious thought, our religion becomes all about our performance, and then we think everything that happens or will ever happen isa bout us. When I forget the incarnation, sinless life, death, resurrection, and ascension, I quickly believe that I'm supposed to be the unrivaled supreme, and matchless one. It's at this point that I'm particularly in need of an intravenous dose of gospel truth. He is preeminent.
Elyse M. Fitzpatrick
My work with teenagers has convinced me that one of the main reasons teenagers are not excited by the gospel is that they do not think they need it. Many parents have successfully raised self-righteous little Pharisees. When they look at themselves, they do not see a sinner in desperate need, so they are not grateful for a Savior. Sadly, the same is true of many of their parents.
Timothy D. Lane
If I look closely, my failures are less about my inadequacies and more about the fact that I channel my abilities into the wrong places.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
The problem with wearing a facade is that sooner or later life shows up with a big pair of scissors.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
To blithely discard the spent kernels of something that has ended is to discard the very resources that have painstakingly been harvested from that ending from which a spirited new beginning will be cultivated.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
What I would be quite wise to remember is that ‘pieces’ are not the end of what was, but the beginning of what is to be.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Sure, things die. Yet hard on the heels of every death there comes a birth. And if the life around me is being perpetually refreshed in such a relentless manner, why would I think that the life within me can’t have the same experience.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Too often our lives are soiled to desperation by endings that in reality are magnificently outnumbered by beginnings. And unless we become convinced that an ending is always the birthplace of a beginning that is on its way, we will live terribly soiled lives.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Contentment can only happen as we increase desire, let it run itself out towar its fulfilment, and carry us along with it.
John Eldredge
Listening is a gift of spiritual significance that you can learn to give to others. When you listen, you give one a sense of importance, hope and love that he or she may not receive any other way. Through listening, we nurture and validate the feelings one has, especially when he or she experiences difficulties in life.
H. Norman Wright
God is too great to be glorified only through the lives of His victorious children. He is glorified by our suffering and even by our sin. His sustaining strength is glorified when we walk through the furnace of affliction.
Elyse M. Fitzpatrick
Minutes remain the same length whether they are held against the span of years or minutes themselves. Yet, when minutes are held against themselves, they seem so terribly brief. Therefore, we’d be wise to celebrate life before minutes are all that’s left.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Judging others shackles them to the cold iron of our limited notions.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Somewhere, somehow, something arises out of the ashes of our losses to remind us that nothing ever ceases. Nothing ever vanishes. Nothing ever comes to nothing.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
If there is any solace to be found in the carnage of September 11th, may I find it in understanding that the potential to do great good can handily rival the tendency to carry out great evil. And out of that understanding may I commit in my own life to make certain that in such a critical rivalry I will ensure that towers will never fall because of me, but people will be raised up due to me.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Codependency is a learned set of behaviors, thought processes, and habits. When combined together, they fit a very loose definition. All people exhibit these traits to some degree, but some of us allow them to dictate our relationships with others and ourselves.
David W. Earle
Being judgmental is a form of attack keeping others off balance.
David W. Earle
Boundary violations are deeply experienced.
David W. Earle
With improved coping skills forged through my midlife crisis, I now listen first and do not control, and I allow these now adult children to come to their own conclusions about what they want for their lives.
David W. Earle
Sometimes chaos is the very thing that deliberately shakes up our neatly ordered world’s in order to get us out of the neatly ordered ruts that have kept us stuck.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Have we ever thought to consider that we create values that ‘feel’ right because they serve our current agendas, which is an infinitely different thing from values that ‘are’ right because they serve an eternal agenda?
Craig D. Lounsbrough
If we ignorantly act to solely serve our agenda, we’re simply slogging around in the egocentric and brackish backwaters of selfishness. Any response that comes out of that kind of cesspool will be vulgarly irresponsible.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
If it’s the benefit to myself that drives my decisions, I can know that I’m driving down a long road with a short bridge.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
Too often we want to take stands to elevate us rather than elevate a cause.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
We ignore the Holy Spirit when we position ourselves at the center of life. - From the Book: Removing Your Shame Label.
Eddie Capparucci