Quotes by Authors - Page 5067

My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
Winston S. Churchill
Percy wouldn't notice a joke if it danced naked in front of him wearing one of Dobby's hats.
J.K. Rowling
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.
Mark Twain
Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, it's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope.
Dr. Seuss
So please, oh please, we beg, we pray,Go throw your TV set away,And in its place you can installA lovely bookshelf on the wall.Then fill the shelves with lots of books.
Roald Dahl
I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
Mark Twain
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
Douglas Adams
What the hell is that?" I laughed."It's my fox hat.""Your fox hat?""Yeah, Pudge. My fox hat.""Why are you wearing your fox hat?" I asked."Because no one can catch the motherfucking fox.
John Green
When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why god? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, There's just something about you that pisses me off.
Stephen King
If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?
Laurence J. Peter
THE FIRST TEN LIES THEY TELL YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL 1. We are here to help you. 2. You will have time to get to your class before the bell rings. 3. The dress code will be enforced. 4. No smoking is allowed on school grounds. 5. Our football team will win the championship this year. 6. We expect more of you here. 7. Guidance counselors are always available to listen. 8. Your schedule was created with you in mind. 9. Your locker combination is private. 10. These will be the years you look back on fondly. TEN MORE LIES THEY TELL YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL 1. You will use algebra in your adult lives. 2. Driving to school is a privilege that can be taken away. 3. Students must stay on campus during lunch. 4. The new text books will arrive any day now. 5. Colleges care more about you than your SAT scores. 6. We are enforcing the dress code. 7. We will figure out how to turn off the heat soon. 8. Our bus drivers are highly trained professionals. 9. There is nothing wrong with summer school. 10. We want to hear what you have to say.
Laurie Halse Anderson
I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
Jerome K. Jerome
The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
George Carlin
I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal.
Jane Austen
You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Need I say more?
Chris Rock
Death's got an Invisibility Cloak?" Harry interrupted again."So he can sneak up on people," said Ron. "Sometimes he gets bored of running at them, flapping his arms and shrieking...
J.K. Rowling
Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH', the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.
Terry Pratchett
Is it true that you shouted at Professor Umbridge?""Yes.""You called her a liar?""Yes.""You told her He Who Must Not Be Named is back?""Yes.""Have a biscuit, Potter.
J.K. Rowling
Mr. Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business.Mr. Prongs agrees with Mr. Moony, and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly git.Mr. Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became a professor.Mr. Wormtail bids Professor Snape good day, and advises him to wash his hair, the slimeball.
J.K. Rowling
He can run faster than Severus Snape confronted with shampoo.
J.K. Rowling
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer
Douglas Adams
Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.
Terry Pratchett
Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like.
Lemony Snicket
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you.
Rita Mae Brown
Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter?""Yes," said Harry stiffly."Yes, sir.""There's no need to call me "sir" Professor."The words had escaped him before he knew what he was saying.
J.K. Rowling
Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.
Charles J. Sykes
Remember, we're madly in love, so it's all right to kiss me anytime you feel like it.
Suzanne Collins
The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
George Carlin
The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.
Terry Pratchett
Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.
Charles Bukowski
The story so far:In the beginning the Universe was created.This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
Douglas Adams
Saying 'I notice you're a nerd' is like saying, 'Hey, I notice that you'd rather be intelligent than be stupid, that you'd rather be thoughtful than be vapid, that you believe that there are things that matter more than the arrest record of Lindsay Lohan. Why is that?' In fact, it seems to me that most contemporary insults are pretty lame. Even 'lame' is kind of lame. Saying 'You're lame' is like saying 'You walk with a limp.' Yeah, whatever, so does 50 Cent, and he's done all right for himself.
John Green
Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
Garrison Keillor
I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
Douglas Adams
Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.
Mark Twain
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
Steve Martin
The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.
Jane Austen
Spirituality exist in testing and experiencing the depth of inner peace consistently.
Amit Ray
Do you love yourself enough to BE what you love yourself enough to WANT?
Steve Maraboli
Sometimes you deal with the devil not because you want to, but because if you don't, someone else will.
Laurell K. Hamilton
CLAUDIA: I love you as high as the sky and as deep as the sea.MICHAEL: Multiply my love by infinity and take it to the depths of forever, and you still have only a glimpse of how much I feel for you. I love you more.
Mary Ting
Life is a barter of choice and consequences.
Samantha Sotto
cause when there's life there's still hope
Michael Morpurgo
[The decay of Logic results from an] untroubled assumption that the particular is real and the universal is not.
C.S. Lewis
What other people think of me is not my business.
Michael J. Fox
Prayer is beyond any question the highest activity of the human soul. Man is at his greatest and highest when upon his knees he comes face to face with God.
D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones
There is something good in all seeming failures. You are not to see that now. Time will reveal it. Be patient.
Sivananda Saraswati
Often, moreover, it is...that aspect of our being that society finds eccentric, ridiculous, or disagreeable, that holds our sweet waters, our secret well of happiness, the key to our equanimity in malevolent climes.
Tom Robbins
Because saving the people you love isn't stupid. It isn't even a choice
Kami Garcia
Religious people fear hell -- Spiritual people have walked thru it.
Frank Warren
We could all do with a bit more joy in our lives couldn't we? The wonderful thing is that when we start spreading joy, we begin to actually experience more joy in our lives too!
Steve Goodier
The bottom line is, insults only hurt when they come from someone I respect.
Kresley Cole
All of the great empires of the future will be empires of the mind.
Winston S. Churchill
Actually, you can be bad at something...but if you love doing it, that will be enough. - August Boatwright
Sue Monk Kidd
Why are you being so mean?""Friends tell friends the truth.""yeah, but not to hurt, to help.
Laurie Halse Anderson
Islam and Christianity promise eternal paradise to the faithful. And that is a powerful opiate, certainly, the hope of a better life to come. But there's a Sufi story that challenges the notion that people believe only because they need an opiate. Rabe'a al-Adiwiyah, a great woman saint of Sufism, was seem running through the streets of her hometown, Basra, carrying a torch in one hand and a bucket of water in the other. When someone asked her what she was doing, she answered, 'I am going to take this bucket of water and pour it on the flames of hell, and then I am going to use this torch to burn down the gates of paradise so that people will not love God for want of heaven of fear of hell, but because He is God.
John Green
I Love Loving YouYou are my favorite song; a rhythm of beauty that captures my spirit.You are my favorite poem; an exquisite grouping of ideas set in motion with an unmatched enchanting elegance. You are my best friend; from our laughter to our deep conversations, our moments together are a timeless pleasure.You are my soul mate; a connection so pure, so powerful, that it can only be considered divine. You are my lover; a passionate entwinement, a chorus of ecstasy, and a feeling of complete unity that words could never adequately describe.You are my angel; you remind me of the goodness in this world and inspire me to be the greatest version of myself.You are my home; it is in your loving gaze that I find the comfort, acceptance, and the sense of belonging. You are my love ~ mi amor; there are not enough days in forever to allow me to fully express my love for you.I love loving you.
Steve Maraboli
Even if it's absurd to think you can change things, it's even more absurd to believe that it is foolish and unimportant to try.
Peter C. Newman
We would do ourselves a tremendous favor by letting go of the people who poison our spirit.
Steve Maraboli
What others think about you is none of your business.
Jack Canfield