Quotes by Authors - Page 5065

For instance, this new idea that You-Know-Who can kill with a single glance from his eyes. That’s a basilisk, listeners. One simple test: Check whether the thing that’s glaring at you has got legs. If it has, it’s safe to look into its eyes, although if it really is You-Know-Who, that’s still likely to be the last thing you ever do.
J.K. Rowling
People say, 'I'm going to sleep now,' as if it were nothing. But it's really a bizarre activity. 'For the next several hours, while the sun is gone, I'm going to become unconscious, temporarily losing command over everything I know and understand. When the sun returns, I will resume my life.'If you didn't know what sleep was, and you had only seen it in a science fiction movie, you would think it was weird and tell all your friends about the movie you'd seen.They had these people, you know? And they would walk around all day and be OK? And then, once a day, usually after dark, they would lie down on these special platforms and become unconscious. They would stop functioning almost completely, except deep in their minds they would have adventures and experiences that were completely impossible in real life. As they lay there, completely vulnerable to their enemies, their only movements were to occasionally shift from one position to another; or, if one of the 'mind adventures' got too real, they would sit up and scream and be glad they weren't unconscious anymore. Then they would drink a lot of coffee.'So, next time you see someone sleeping, make believe you're in a science fiction movie. And whisper, 'The creature is regenerating itself.
George Carlin
To you, I'm an atheist.To God, I'm the loyal opposition.
Woody Allen
Meow” means “woof” in cat.
George Carlin
So what? All writers are lunatics!
Cornelia Funke
Four flips the gun in this hand, presses the barrel to Peter's forehead, and clicks a bullet into place. Peter freezes with his lips parted, the yawn dead in his mouth. "Wake. Up," Four snaps. "You are holding a loaded gun, you idiot. Act like it.
Veronica Roth
People have an annoying habit of remembering things they shouldn't.
Christopher Paolini
Hey, Rosalie? Do you know how to drown a blonde? Stick a mirror to the bottom of a pool.
Stephenie Meyer
I told Augustus the broad outline of my miracle: diagnosed with Stage IV thyroid cancer when I was thirteen. (I didn’t tell him that the diagnosis came three months after I got my first period. Like: Congratulations! You’re a woman. Now die.)
John Green
Technically, I am unarmed. But no one should ever underestimate the harm that fingernails can do. Especially if the target is unprepared.
Suzanne Collins
French name, English accent, American school. Anna confused.
Stephanie Perkins
There is nothing like puking with somebody to make you into old friends.
Sylvia Plath
If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, "Well this isn't too bad, I don't have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I'm left-handed or right-handed," but most of us would say something more along the lines of, "Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!
Lemony Snicket
Everywhere I go I'm asked if I think the university stifles writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them. There's many a best-seller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
Flannery O'Connor
Are you always a smartass?'Nope. Sometimes I'm asleep.
Jim Butcher
It seemed weird calling a teenager 'sir' but I'd learned to be careful with immortals. They tended to get offended easily. Then, they blew stuff up.
Rick Riordan
As long as we don't die, this is gonna be one hell of a story.
John Green
Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space.
Douglas Adams
It's like learning to ride a unicorn. You never forget.
Eoin Colfer
Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.
George Carlin
Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they'd lock us up?"All the time.
Wendy Mass
It takes a lot of time to be a genius. You have to sit around so much, doing nothing, really doing nothing.
Gertrude Stein
Rachel: You're a half-blood, too?Annabeth: Shhh! Just announce it to the world, how about?Rachel: Okay. Hey, everybody! These two aren't human! They're half Greek god!...They don't seem to care.
Rick Riordan
Sometimes you remind me a lot of James. He called it my 'furry little problem' in company. Many people were under the impression that I owned a badly behaved rabbit.
J.K. Rowling
He cleared his throat and held up one hand dramatically.“Green grass breaks through snow.tArtemis pleads for my help.tHe grinned at us, waiting for applause.t"That last line was four syllables.” Artemis said.tApollo frowned. “Was it?”t“No, no, that’s six syllable, hhhm.” He started muttering to himself. That’s five syllables!” He bowed, looking very pleased with himself.
Rick Riordan
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
George Carlin
Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind.
Terry Pratchett
Where is Wood?" said Harry, suddenly realizing he wasn't there."Still in the showers," said Fred. "We think he's trying to drown himself.
J.K. Rowling
If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a little faster.
Isaac Asimov
The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.
Mark Twain
If you are a student you should always get a good nights sleep unless you have come to the good part of your book, and then you should stay up all night and let your schoolwork fall by the wayside, a phrase which means 'flunk'.
Lemony Snicket
Nothing travels faster than the speed of light, with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws.
Douglas Adams
People, generally, suck.
Christopher Moore
Can you be a girl for a few seconds?""I'm always a girl" I frown."You know what I mean. Like a silly, annoying girl"I twirl my hair around my finger. "Kay.
Veronica Roth
Seventeen, eh!" said Hagrid as he accepted a bucket-sized glass of wine from Fred."Six years to the day we met, Harry, d’yeh remember it?""Vaguely," said Harry, grinning up at him. "Didn’t you smash down the front door, give Dudley a pig’s tail, and tell me I was a wizard?""I forge’ the details," Hagrid chortled.
J.K. Rowling
It crosses my mind that Cinna's calm and normal demeanor masks a complete madman.
Suzanne Collins
It's hard to enjoy practical jokes when your whole life feels like one.
Rick Riordan
Moths," repeats Will. "You're afraid of moths?" "Not just a cloud of moths," she says, "like...a swarm of them. Everywhere. All those wings and legs and..." She shudders and shakes her head."Terrifying," Will says with mock seriousness. "That's my girl. Tough as cotton balls.""Oh, Shut up.
Veronica Roth
Of course motivation is not permanent. But then, neither is bathing; but it is something you should do on a regular basis.
Zig Ziglar
Can you surf really well, then?"I looked at Grover, who was trying hard not to laugh."Jeez, Nico," I said. "I've never really tried."He went on asking questions. Did I fight a lot with Thalia, since she was a daughter of Zeus? (I didn't answer that one.) If Annabeth's mother was Athena, the goddess of wisdom, then why didn't Annabeth know better than to fall off a cliff? (I tried not to strangle Nico for asking that one.) Was Annabeth my girlfriend? (At this point, I was ready to stick the kid in a meat-flavored sack and throw him to the wolves.)
Rick Riordan
Oh, we're playing nice now? Shall we have tea first? Brew up a nice pot of kiss-my-ass?
Julie Kagawa
DON'T THINK OF IT AS DYING, said Death. JUST THINK OF IT AS LEAVING EARLY TO AVOID THE RUSH.
Terry Pratchett
You deal with mythological stuff for a few years, you learn that paradises are usually places where you get killed.
Rick Riordan
Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with.
Candace Bushnell
What's up?" I asked.You tell me," he said. "You were the one about ready to start making out with Adrian."It was an experiment," I said. "It was part of my therapy."What the hell kind of therapy are you in?
Richelle Mead
I hope you're pleased with yourselves. We could all have been killed - or worse, expelled. Now if you don't mind, I'm going to bed.
J.K. Rowling
I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.
Mark Twain
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
George Carlin
An Unbreakable Vow?" said Ron, looking stunned. "Nah, he can’t have.... Are you sure?""Yes I’m sure," said Harry. "Why, what does it mean?""Well, you can’t break an Unbreakable Vow...""I’d worked that much out for myself, funnily enough.
J.K. Rowling
Why are you worrying about YOU-KNOW-WHO, when you should be worrying about YOU-NO-POO? The constipation sensation that's gripping the nation!
J.K. Rowling
Ginny!" said Mr. Weasley, flabbergasted. "Haven't I taught you anything? What have I always told you? Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain?
J.K. Rowling
Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way.
Steve Martin
Headline?" he asked."'Swing Set Needs Home,'" I said."'Desperately Lonely Swing Set Needs Loving Home,'" he said."'Lonely, Vaguely Pedophilic Swing Set Seeks the Butts of Children,'" I said.
John Green
The longer and more carefully we look at a funny story, the sadder it becomes.
Nikolai Gogol
In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded.
Terry Pratchett
A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
Phyllis Diller
Confidence is ignorance. If you're feeling cocky, it's because there's something you don't know.
Eoin Colfer
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
Dorothy Parker
I love books, by the way, way more than movies. Movies tell you what to think. A good book lets you choose a few thoughts for yourself. Movies show you the pink house. A good book tells you there's a pink house and lets you paint some of the finishing touches, maybe choose the roof style,park your own car out front. My imagination has always topped anything a movie could come up with. Case in point, those darned Harry Potter movies. That was so not what that part-Veela-chick, Fleur Delacour, looked like.
Karen Marie Moning
I'm going to wake Peeta," I say."No, wait," says Finnick. "Let's do it together. Put our faces right in front of his."Well, there's so little opportunity for fun left in my life, I agree. We position ourselves on either side of Peeta, lean over until our faces are inches frim his nose, and give him a shake. "Peeta. Peeta, wake up," I say in a soft, singsong voice.His eyelids flutter open and then he jumps like we've stabbed him. "Aa!"Finnick and I fall back in the sand, laughing our heads off. Every time we try to stop, we look at Peeta's attempt to maintain a disdainful expression and it sets us off again.
Suzanne Collins