Quotes by Authors - Page 5064

Harry — I think I've just understood something! I've got to go to the library!”And she sprinted away, up the stairs. does she understand?” said Harry distractedly, still looking around, trying to tell where the voice had come from.“Loads more than I do,” said Ron, shaking his head.“But why’s she got to go to the library?”“Because that’s what Hermione does,” said Ron, shrugging. “When in doubt, go to the library.
J.K. Rowling
Half of seeming clever is keeping your mouth shut at the right times.
Patrick Rothfuss
Let's carpe the hell out of this diem.
Alexandra Bracken
You are speaking of my future lover. Be more respectful.
Charlaine Harris
Who're you going with, then?" said Ron."Angelina," said Fred promptly, without a trace of embarrassment."What?" said Ron, taken aback. "You've already asked her?""Good point," said Fred. He turned his head and called across the common room, "Oi! Angelina!"Angelina, who had been chatting with Alicia Spinnet near the fire, looked over at him."What?" She called back."Want to come to the ball with me?"Angelina gave Fred a sort of appraising look."All right, then," she said, and she turned back to Alicia and carried on chatting with a bit of a grin on her face."There you go," said Fred to Harry and Ron, "piece of cake.
J.K. Rowling
Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.
David Sedaris
Look, let me just say it: He was hot. A nonhot boy stares at you relentlessly and it is, at best, awkward and, at worst, a form of assault. But a hot boy . . . well.
John Green
It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever," he said. "Have you thought of going into teaching?
Terry Pratchett
April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.
Mark Twain
Oh Tigger, where are your manners?""I don’t know, but I bet they’re having more fun than I am.
A.A. Milne
Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.
Dorothy Parker
Well, I certainly don't," said Percy sanctimoniously. "I shudder to think what the state of my in-tray would be if I was away from work for five days." "Yeah, someone might slip dragon dung in it again, eh, Perce?" said Fred. "That was a sample of fertilizer from Norway!" said Percy, going very red in the face. "It was nothing personal!" "It was," Fred whispered to Harry as they got up from the table. "We sent it.
J.K. Rowling
You nicked-named my daughter after the Lock Ness Monster!
Stephenie Meyer
Somebody just gave me a shower radio. Thanks a lot. Do you really want music in the shower? I guess there's no better place to dance than a slick surface next to a glass door.
Jerry Seinfeld
Mistletoe," said Luna dreamily, pointing at a large clump of white berries placed almost over Harry's head. He jumped out from under it. "Good thinking," said Luna seriously. "It's often infested with nargles.
J.K. Rowling
There are two types of people in this world. People who hate clowns...and clowns. (Bobby Pendragon)
D.J. MacHale
I dreamed I was buying new shoes last night," said Ron. "What d'ya think that's gonna mean?""Probably that you're going to be eaten by a giant marshmallow or something," said Harry.
J.K. Rowling
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
Mark Twain
Ask me if I sparkle and I’ll kill you where you stand.” (Bones)
Jeaniene Frost
You can safely assume you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do.
Anne Lamott
You should eat a waffle! You can't be sad if you eat a waffle!
Lauren Myracle
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
Joseph Heller
[My mom's] funny that way, celebrating special occasions with blue food. I think it's her way of saying anything is possible. Percy can pass seventh grade. Waffles can be blue. Little miracles like that.
Rick Riordan
It's snowing still," said Eeyore gloomily."So it is.""And freezing.""Is it?""Yes," said Eeyore. "However," he said, brightening up a little, "we haven't had an earthquake lately.
A.A. Milne
You are the shuckiest shuck faced shuck in the world!
James Dashner
Did you like question ten, Moony?" asked Sirius as they emerged into the entrance hall."Loved it," said Lupin briskly. "Give five signs that identify the werewolf. Excellent question.""D'you think you managed to get all the signs?" said James in tones of mock concern."Think I did," said Lupin seriously, as they joined the crowd thronging around the front doors eager to get out into the sunlit grounds. "One: He's sitting on my chair. Two: He's wearing my clothes. Three: His name's Remus Lupin...
J.K. Rowling
Sometimes you just have to pee in the sink.
Charles Bukowski
Why it's simply impassible!Alice: Why, don't you mean impossible? Nothing's impossible!
Lewis Carroll
I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.
Steve Martin
Y'all smoke to enjoy it. I smoke to die.
John Green
Is that a bulletproof vest? See, now that's so insulting. That's like saying I'm not smart enough to shoot you in the head." Eddie DeChooch
Janet Evanovich
I am not absentminded. It is the presence of mind that makes me unaware of everything else.
G.K. Chesterton
I really can't think about kissing when I've got a rebellion to incite.
Suzanne Collins
There is nothing more luxurious than eating while you read—unless it be reading while you eat. Amabel did both: they are not the same thing, as you will see if you think the matter over.
E Nesbit
Humor is almost always anger with its make-up on.
Stephen King
...disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business....
Tom Robbins
Sometimes the sins you haven't committed are all you have left to hold onto.
David Sedaris
I don't mean to be rude—" he began, in a tone that threatened rudeness in every syllable."Yet, sadly, accidental rudeness occurs alarmingly often," Dumbledore finished the sentence gravely.
J.K. Rowling
Hercules,huh? Percy frowned. "That guy was like the Starbucks of Ancient Greece. Everywhere you turn--there he is.
Rick Riordan
It may help to understand human affairs to be clear that most of the great triumphs and tragedies of history are caused, not by people being fundamentally good or fundamentally bad, but by people being fundamentally people.
Neil Gaiman
Touch her, and I'll freeze your testicles off and put them in a jar. Understand?
Julie Kagawa
Hey," said Shadow. "Huginn or Muninn, or whoever you are." The bird turned, head tipped, suspiciously, on one side, and it stared at him with bright eyes."Say 'Nevermore,'" said Shadow."Fuck you," said the raven.
Neil Gaiman
They slipped briskly into an intimacy from which they never recovered.
F. Scott Fitzgerald
No! Please! I'll tell you whatever you want to know!" the man yelled. "Really?" said Vimes. "What's the orbital velocity of the moon?""What?""Oh, you'd like something simpler?
Terry Pratchett
You know what would help?" I asked, not meeting his eyes."Hmm?""If you turned off this crap music and put on something that came out after the Berlin Wall went down."Dimitri laughted. "Your worst class is history, yet somehow, you know everything about Eastern Europe.""Hey, gotta have material for my jokes, Comrade." Still smiling, he turned the radio dail. To a country station."Hey! This isn't what I had in mind," I exclaimed. I could tell he was on the verge of laughing again."Pick. It's one or the other."I sighed. "Go back to the 1980s stuff."He flipped the dail, and I crossed my arms over my chest as some vaguely European-sounding band sang about how video had killed the radio star. I wished someone would kill this radio.
Richelle Mead
Sections in the bookstore- Books You Haven't Read- Books You Needn't Read- Books Made for Purposes Other Than Reading- Books Read Even Before You Open Them Since They Belong to the Category of Books Read Before Being Written- Books That If You Had More Than One Life You Would Certainly Also Read But Unfortunately Your Days Are Numbered- Books You Mean to Read But There Are Others You Must Read First- Books Too Expensive Now and You'll Wait 'Til They're Remaindered- Books ditto When They Come Out in Paperback- Books You Can Borrow from Somebody- Books That Everybody's Read So It's As If You Had Read Them, Too- Books You've Been Planning to Read for Ages- Books You've Been Hunting for Years Without Success- Books Dealing with Something You're Working on at the Moment- Books You Want to Own So They'll Be Handy Just in Case- Books You Could Put Aside Maybe to Read This Summer- Books You Need to Go with Other Books on Your Shelves- Books That Fill You with Sudden, Inexplicable Curiosity, Not Easily Justified- Books Read Long Ago Which It's Now Time to Re-read- Books You've Always Pretended to Have Read and Now It's Time to Sit Down and Really Read Them
Italo Calvino
Inconceivable!""You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
William Goldman
have i gone mad?im afraid so, but let me tell you something, the best people usualy are.
Lewis Carroll
We did it, we bashed them wee Potter's the one, and Voldy's gone moldy, so now let's have fun!
J.K. Rowling
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.
Garrison Keillor
The Little Boy and the Old ManSaid the little boy, "Sometimes I drop my spoon."Said the old man, "I do that too."The little boy whispered, "I wet my pants."I do that too," laughed the little old man.Said the little boy, "I often cry."The old man nodded, "So do I."But worst of all," said the boy, "it seemsGrown-ups don't pay attention to me."And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.I know what you mean," said the little old man.
Shel Silverstein
You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm.It's really funny.
Brandon Sanderson
A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.
Mark Twain
That wasn't any act of God. That was an act of pure human fuckery.
Stephen King
She'd also called me brave...unless she was talking to the catfish.
Rick Riordan
When beetles fight these battles in a bottle with their paddles and the bottle's on a poodle and the poodle's eating noodles......they call this a muddle puddle tweetle poodle beetle noodle bottle paddle battle.
Dr. Seuss
Man, you weigh a freaking ton," he told me. "What've you been eating, rocks?" "Why, is your head missing some?" I croaked. His mouth almost quirked in a smile, and that's when I knew how upset he'd been
James Patterson
A literary academic can no more pass a bookstore than an alcoholic can pass a bar.
Carolyn G. Heilbrun
Takes a lot of tries before you hit perfection." He paused to reconsider that. "Well, except for my parents. They got it on the first try." (Adrian)
Richelle Mead
Harry, don't go picking a row with Malfoy, don't forget, he's a prefect now, he could make life difficult for you...""Wow, I wonder what it'd be like to have a difficult life?" said Harry sarcastically.
J.K. Rowling