Vironika Tugaleva Quotes

It is almost as if we are all playing a big game of hide-and-go-seek. We all hide expecting to be found, but no one has been labelled the seeker. We stand behind the wall, at first excited, then worried, then bored, then anxious, then angry. We hide and hide. After a while, the game is not fun anymore. Where is my seeker? Where is the person who is supposed to come find me here in my protected shell and cut me open? Where is that one who will make me trust him, make me comfortable, make me feel whole? Some people rot on the spot, waiting for the seeker that never comes. The most important truth that I can relate to you, if you are hiding and waiting, is that the seeker is you and the world, behind so many walls, awaits.
Vironika Tugaleva
You are eternal, beautiful, and real.
Vironika Tugaleva
Most things that are true are simple. To lose weight, eat less than you burn. To reduce stress, find a job you love. To resolve conflict, be patient and peaceful. These are very, very simple in that they are complete concepts that take no more than a sentence to say. They are not, however, easy, because they must be applied consistently.
Vironika Tugaleva
We all have an inner intuition for authenticity, for matched up internal and external truth. When we detect this, we feel immediate comfort. We know truth when we hear it.
Vironika Tugaleva
We all know, intuitively, that if something is humanly possible, it is possible for ourselves.
Vironika Tugaleva
World peace is really inner peace within each individual mind.
Vironika Tugaleva
Our culture has bred consumers and addicts. We eat too much, buy too much, and want too much. We set ourselves on the fruitless mission of filling the gaping hole within us with material things. Blindly, we consume more and more, believing we are hungry for more food, status, or money, yet really we are hungry for connection.
Vironika Tugaleva
Plenty of people will think you're crazy, no matter what you do. Don't let that stop you from finding the people who think you're incredible—the ones who need to hear your voice, because it reminds them of their own. Your tribe. They're out there. Don’t let your critics interfere with your search for them.
Vironika Tugaleva
There are, literally, thousands of people all around the world who need nothing more than to meet someone just like you. To spend your time pretending to be someone else is just as senseless and fear-driven as spending your time speaking to people who don’t understand you. Find your tribe. Let yourself be seen. You are already someone’s hero.
Vironika Tugaleva
Those who doubt themselves will doubt you. Those who limit themselves will try to limit you. Do not fight them. Smile, go your own way, and trust that your example is enough.
Vironika Tugaleva
If the most connected we’ve ever felt with another person was in that brief moment of apology and regret after physical abuse, then we’ll seek that abuse for the rest of our lives.
Vironika Tugaleva
What if we all stopped fighting to belong and realized that we already do? What if we acknowledged, in each interaction with ourselves and with others, the eternal, beautiful interconnected energy that flows between us? What if we recognized our equality and celebrated our differences? Imagine how the world could be.
Vironika Tugaleva
There is no need to become unique. We already are unique. There is no need to become equal. We already are equal. The greatest tragedies of humankind have come from people trying to force sameness on the level we are different, and trying to become different on the level we are the same. Peace is a matter of recognizing what is already there, not creating something new.
Vironika Tugaleva
For so long, I was stuck in "either or" thinking. Either I had to change myself, or change the world. Either it was his fault or my fault. Either you had to stop acting that way or I had to stop reacting this way. Either there was something wrong with me or something wrong with them. I would fluctuate between both ends of this dynamic. I'd blame myself for some time and do everything I could to change. When that became tiresome, I'd blame the other, doing everything I could to make them change. When the resentment and frustration became too strong, I'd blame myself again.I've learned that it's never either or. It's always both. I've also learned that, because it's always both, there's no such thing as fault. Fault is only something we can ascribe when we see things superficially. When we look deeper, we see multi-layered, complex systems of causes and effects which affect and are affected by all individuals involved. Fault is a useless concept. Responsibility, however, is the most helpful concept of them all.It's not my fault. It's not his or yours or theirs either. But it is all our responsibility. When we come together like this, we don't have to see-saw back and forth, passing on guilt and blame. We can grow. We can evolve. We can build a better world.
Vironika Tugaleva
We sacrifice our potential because we do not know that we are pure potential.
Vironika Tugaleva
Fear becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Thinking that there is something to be avoided manifests something to avoid.
Vironika Tugaleva
The desire to be loved, to feel loved, is behind every diet, pill, surgery, and lie. It is behind each act of violence and every affair as well as each organized religion and every method of self-help.
Vironika Tugaleva
Our minds thirst for anything that reminds us of the deepest wisdom of the soul.
Vironika Tugaleva
Love is not the opposite of power. Love IS power. Love is the strongest power there is.
Vironika Tugaleva
Everything changes. The leaves, the weather, the colour of your hair, the texture of your skin. The feelings you have today - whether they kill you or enthrall you - won’t be the same tomorrow, so let go. Celebrate. Enjoy. Nothing lasts, except your decision to celebrate everything, everyone, for the beauty that is there within each moment, each smile, each impermanent flicker of infinity.
Vironika Tugaleva
Being happy where you are does not mean that you must unquestioningly accept parts of your environment that don't serve you. Where you are is inside of this amazing body, this beautiful moment, this capable mind. Where you are is inside of an eternal opportunity. And sometimes you need to change your environment to remember that.
Vironika Tugaleva
I am happiest when I clear my mind and allow the world around me to reteach me what I thought I already knew.
Vironika Tugaleva
Looking with eyes of love is about not only looking, but seeing.
Vironika Tugaleva
Trying to keep up appearances is a signal of decay on the inside. Beware shallow living—in yourself and in others. It is only in the depths that life can thrive.
Vironika Tugaleva
Love, happiness, peace - these are not final destinations. They are in every moment, every breath, everything.
Vironika Tugaleva
The ultimate barrier against love is the barrier of the constructed self.
Vironika Tugaleva
To maintain any degree of sanity, we must believe that everything is interconnected on some level and to experience that level fully once in a while.
Vironika Tugaleva
Whatever you do, it will be a path. Life does not work like a light switch - on/off, fat/skinny, miserable/happy, crazy/sane. All things take time, patience, and practice. Anyone who tells you different is profiting off your fearful ignorance of the truth.
Vironika Tugaleva
Whether something is wonderful or horrible, the most harmful thought we can think is “Will this last forever?
Vironika Tugaleva
Of course, being open and vulnerable will lead us to, sometimes, experience pain. But what is pain? It is simply a feeling. It is not forever. If you get pain from some person or thing too many times, you can always walk away. To risk a lifetime without pleasure simply to avoid pain is ludicrous.
Vironika Tugaleva
It is not until you learn to look at yourself, through the truth of who you are, that you can look at someone else.
Vironika Tugaleva
Peace is life. Love is life. No river holds a grudge against a rock in its path. No leaf refuses to blow in the breeze. No plant denies water or sunshine. We, as human beings, have the gift of self-awareness, but this gift quickly turns to self-destruction if we do not learn to use it. We must learn to turn our minds towards the peace and love that we are flowing within at any given moment. This is the key to serenity. This is The Love Mindset.
Vironika Tugaleva
Some journeys, we must take alone. The caterpillar does not judge itself for craving the cocoon. Do not fear the isolated path. There, you will not be lonely. You will meet yourself.
Vironika Tugaleva
The greatest freedom in this world is a sense of self detached from appearances so that we may sacrifice today’s comforts for tomorrow’s opportunities.
Vironika Tugaleva
No one needs to hit rock bottom to change. And yet so many people do, only because most of us are unskilled in communicating with ourselves.Stress, depression, anxiety, insomnia, headaches, illness ... these are all symptoms of a bigger problem. You're trying to tell yourself something. Loudly.Listen now or listen later. There is no ignoring the call.
Vironika Tugaleva
Our inner wisdom is persistent, but quiet. It will always whisper, but it will never stop knocking at your door.
Vironika Tugaleva
To persevere is one thing, but to push on ignoring your intuition is something quite different. Self-awareness is the practice of learning the difference.
Vironika Tugaleva
Those who seek to listen to their own inner voice forget to listen to the judgment of others.
Vironika Tugaleva
Self-discovery changes everything, including your relationships with people. When you find your authentic self, those who loved your mask are disappointed. you may end up alone, but you don’t need to stay alone. While it’s painful to sever old connections, it’s not a tragedy. it’s an opportunity. Now, you can find people who understand the importance of looking for truth and being authentic. Now you can find people who want to connect deeply, like you’ve always wanted to, instead of constant small talk and head games. Now you can have real intimacy. Now, you can find your tribe.
Vironika Tugaleva
Unconditional love goes beyond holding on and letting go. Real love is about truth. It's about looking at what's really going on instead of the stories we tell ourselves about it. It's about being able to love someone from afar, when we need to, because we see that closeness turns us into the worst versions of ourselves.
Vironika Tugaleva
I can't tell you how many times in my life I have been told that I have “control issues”. Historically, this statement has brought me annoyance—the kind of irritation that can only be described as a self-protective reaction to having my behaviours labelled for exactly what they were. Needless to say, these accusations would make me defensive. I'd pull my armour tighter and get out my weapons—anything to protect myself from the truth.I realized, one day, that there were only a few things I could control, and a whole lot of things that I couldn't. I realized that trying to control everything around me was a recipe for failure, because it simply wasn't possible.I wish I could tell you that I "let go" then—that it was a lovely, beautiful spiritual moment, and now I'm all better. But that isn't true. Because, for me, seeking to control things which can't be controlled isn't a random tick or flaw. It's a stage of communication in the language of my own mind. If I don't listen to the first whispers that tell me I've repressed some emotion or neglected to process some event—then, stage two starts. Every piece of dirt on the floor, every chewing noise, every unexpected obstacle... they all become intolerable.So, I have two choices when this happens. I can allow my desire to control the outside world to turn into trying to control it. Or, I can allow myself to hear what is being said to me—to interpret this strange language that I speak to myself in and respond with compassion.Do I consistently do the wise thing first? No. I forget. And then I remember, somewhere in the middle of neurotically scrubbing a wall. But I remember faster now than I did before, and sometimes I really am able to respond quickly.It's a journey. I'm not perfect. But I am doing the right thing, and I get better at it every time I have the chance to practice. That's what learning and letting go really is—a practice. It's never over. And it never is, and never will be, perfect.
Vironika Tugaleva
Just because you feel lost doesn't mean that you're doing something wrong. Feeling certain that you are correct in every decision and situation is an addiction. If you think that the journey of self-discovery will bring you more solid facts and certainties about yourself and the world, you will be frustrated. The more you see, the more lost you will feel. That is natural. The more you discover of yourself, the more confused you will become. This is natural. The wiser you get, the more you will see that there are many paths walked by just as many people, and that just because yours is different from someone else's doesn't mean one of you is wrong. This is natural. Over time, you will develop humility, compassion, and a higher tolerance for confusion. If you allow the feeling of being lost to drive you into a search for absolute truths and correct answers, you may feel more secure when you get there, but in reality, you will be taking a step back. Allow yourself to be lost, and you will see so much more of the forest of your soul than if you beeline back for the trail. Explore. Get lost. Embrace the inevitability of confusion.
Vironika Tugaleva
If I were surrounded by people who always approved of me, I wouldn’t need such a deep relationship with my own sense of right and wrong. And you know what that means? It means that other people’s approval is actually a hindrance, more than a helper, when it comes to self-discovery.
Vironika Tugaleva
It is so easy to forget the importance of emotional self-care. Especially when we have obvious symptoms of mental and physical illness. Emotions seem irrelevant, unrelated, invisible. But when we look at a giant oak tree, the seed that bore it is invisible too.
Vironika Tugaleva
Thoughts of harmony allow experiences of harmony.
Vironika Tugaleva
An act of love is not an act for you and not for me. It is an act for you as well as for me. Love is for us.
Vironika Tugaleva
The less people know, the more they talk. The less people understand, the more they try to explain.
Vironika Tugaleva
Our work is not to become unique. We are unique. Our work is to unleash our sense of adventure and to allow the inner whisper that says “come hither” to be reason enough to go.
Vironika Tugaleva
Perhaps the most liberating moment in my life was when I realized that my self-loathing was not a product of my inadequacy but, rather, a product of my thoughts.
Vironika Tugaleva
A healer is someone who seeks to be the light that she wishes she had in her darkest moments.
Vironika Tugaleva
No matter how much you cry, the tears will dry. No matter how many nightmares, flashbacks, visions, or terrors you endure, they will pass. To weather these in order to find your true self and the happiness you deserve, that is not a risk. To waste the time you have in this body, never showing your soul to yourself or anyone else, living in fearful misery – that is really the most dangerous thing you can do.
Vironika Tugaleva
Who can see inside the deepest recesses of your imagination and manifest those wishes into your daily experience? Who can appreciate those subtle nuances of character you've acquired by overcoming your deepest fears? Who can truly respect those things that are no longer a part of you because of all your work to release them? Who can see the strength left behind in the wake of your unique struggles and obstacles? Who will see you for who you are, appreciating everything that is there, everything that is not, everything that can be, if you do not? Who else can?
Vironika Tugaleva
I could not see beauty until I held hands with chaos in silence.
Vironika Tugaleva
Your darkest moments are not meant to be swept under the carpet, hidden from the world in the silent pursuit of perfection. The darkness you've overcome is your ticket into leadership. It's what you're meant to light up in the world.
Vironika Tugaleva
To accept responsibility for your own feelings, your own triggers, and your own experience does not mean to stop communicating with others about how their words and actions affect you. You can own your emotions by not blaming others, and still give the people in your life gentle, loving feedback about how they can treat you in a way that helps your healing and happiness. Creating safe spaces is an interdependent process. It's not ever all about you and it's not ever all about the other person. It's about you coming together and working on the dynamics of your relationship together, taking responsibility for your own part and doing what you can to contribute to the well-being of the other.
Vironika Tugaleva
Every person is driven to self-deceive, simply to get out of the discomfort of the truth. The best relationships are with people who will not let you be blind. They reveal your hidden strengths and your concealed wounds.
Vironika Tugaleva
Emotions are not problems to be solved. They are signals to be interpreted.
Vironika Tugaleva
Most of your healing journey will be about unlearning the patterns of self-protection that once kept you safe.
Vironika Tugaleva
When you discover your own self, you will see that same infinite potential in your lover’s eyes.
Vironika Tugaleva
It is only because we seek love as if it lives outside of us that we miss it, again and again.
Vironika Tugaleva