Ellen Hopkins Quotes

I Want to ShoutLeave me alone!What's wrong with you?Don't you remember who I am? Who you are?This is not a father's love! I want to scream, Can't you see what you are doing to me? What you've done to me? What you've made of me? I want to cry out, I am your little girl. I am not your girlfriend. I am not your whore. I am not my fucking mother! But he is on top of me and my shout is silenced. He is inside of me and my scream stays there too. He is finished. And I don't cry out, but I do cry a bucket of silent tears. He slithers away and at last, I quietly sob
Ellen Hopkins
Not even Carol knows firsthand how it feels to be hurt in such a way by someone who's supposed to protect you
Ellen Hopkins
Something stirred beneath my skin, some being inside I'd only suspected existed, demon or angel, I couldn't say.
Ellen Hopkins
I don't believe in God, don't believe in the devil. Unless you want to count my mother. She might be Satan's sister, I suppose.
Ellen Hopkins
What I don't like is what it sometimes takes to win. Backstabbing. Manipulation. Out-and-out bribery once in a while, and not always the monetary kind.
Ellen Hopkins
...I know there's no such thing as forever. So what can we be, in the now?
Ellen Hopkins
Forever has no meaning when you're living in the moment. I wasn't ready for that moment to end.
Ellen Hopkins
Babies aren't born cruel or filled with sick desire. Evil is not intrinsic. It's fashioned.
Ellen Hopkins
DisappointmentCan do a couple things.It can drop you into a giantsucking sinkhole ofdepression,a place you have to fightto climb out of. Or itcan trigger an epicmaniato overcome the oddsand transform failureinto success. Say youswingas high as the chains willtake you because you seekthe thrill of flight, and on theup-kick, you lose your seat.Injury is likely. But if youworry about fallingdown,and never chance "up,"the sky will remainforever out of reach.
Ellen Hopkins
Librarians were like guardian angels, with graying hair and beady eyes, magnified through reading glasses, and always read to recommend new literary windows to gaze through.
Ellen Hopkins
...Things happenedwhen you were little. Things youdon't remember now, and don't wantto. But they need to escape,need to worm their way outof that dark place in your brainwhere you keep them stashed.
Ellen Hopkins
Innocence eroded into nightmare.All because of very bad touch.Love, corrupted.
Ellen Hopkins
What's the point of being a hero when everyone thinks you're a villain?
Ellen Hopkins
Life is all about change. If it were static, think about how boring it would be. You can't be afraid of it, and you can't worry that you'll mess things up.
Ellen Hopkins
GhostsTake shape under moonlight,materialize in dreams.Shadows. Silhouettesof what is no more. Butghosts don'tbother me. The day bringsbigger things to worry aboutthan flimsy remains ofyesterday. No, spooks don'tscare me.Gauzy apparitions mightprank your psyche oragitate your nightmares,but lackingflesh and bloodthey are powerlessto hurt you-cannot hopeto inflict the kind of damagethat real, livepeople do.
Ellen Hopkins
Funny thing about the monster. The worse he treats you, the more you love him.
Ellen Hopkins
Have you everhad so much to saythat your mouth closed up tightstruggling to harnessthe nuclear forcecoalescing within your words?Have you everhad so many thoughtschurning inside you that you didn’tdare let them escapein case they blew you wide open?Have you everbeen so angry that youcouldn’t look in the mirrorfor fear of finding the face of evilglaring back at you?
Ellen Hopkins
And the scary thing is, I’m on a fast track to that same aviary. Unless I find my wings.
Ellen Hopkins
I thought he'd run if he knew. Instead, he offered help, not that I believed he could possibly help. I thought he'd turn his back, close his heart, slink away. Instead, he promised sanctuary.
Ellen Hopkins
It's probably weird to think about an addiction like it's a sentient being, but that's how it feels. Like it's something living inside you. Something you can't get rid of because killing it means killing you.
Ellen Hopkins
I wanted to meet the monster. Why go down if you can go up?
Ellen Hopkins
Life was radical right after I met the monster.Later, life became harder, complicated.Ultimately, a living hell, like swimming against a riptide,Walking the wrong direction in the fast lane of the freeway, Waking from sweetest dreams to find yourself in the middle of a nightmare.
Ellen Hopkins
A chatWith the Grim Reapershould be enough to scareaway any thought of relapse.Wish it were that easy,but not even days conversingwith death can disintegratethe claws of addiction.
Ellen Hopkins
Nonfiction speaks to the head. Fiction speaks to the heart. Poetry speaks to the soul. It's the essence of beauty. The essence of pain. It pleases the eye and the ear.
Ellen Hopkins
When did creating a flawless facade become a more vital goal than learning to love the person who lives inside your skin?
Ellen Hopkins
I'm afraid it will never be perfect again. I am indelibly stained. Forever redefined, but blurred around the edges.
Ellen Hopkins
I think it’s easyto confuse love with other things.Lust, for one. Need, for another
Ellen Hopkins
But, though I was very much in lust with him, I knew from the start we were nothing like "forever." Maybe because forever is such a scary place.
Ellen Hopkins
It's not easy to get close to anyone.... Everyone's afraid of everybody else.... maybe because we're all afraid of ourselves.
Ellen Hopkins
I've been alone since my mom met Scott.He sucked the nectar from her heartlike a famished butterfly. No nurture,no nourishment left for Kristina.A vacation is a poor substitutefor love.
Ellen Hopkins
But Hey, Guess What Crazy means I'm not liablefor my actions. So screw it, I'll go home, propped up on Prozac against distractions
Ellen Hopkins
crawling up into daddy's lapwhen dad was stillDADDYnodding my head against his chest soaking in the comfort of his heartLISTENINGto the thump...thumpsomewhere beneath muscleand breastbone I remember his armstheir sublimeENCIRCLINGand the shawdow of his voice"I love you, little girl.Put away your bad dreams.Daddy's here"I put them away, Until Daddy became my nightmare that one that cameHOMEfrom work everyday and insteadof picking me up, chased me farfaraway
Ellen Hopkins
I knew from the start we were nothing like "forever". Maybe because forever is such a scary place.
Ellen Hopkins
Some peopleAre worthy of a bullet straightto the heart because that is wherecruelty evolves into evil.Somehumans aren't human at all,despite how they appear.Humanity is what lives insidepeople,harbored beneath skin, flesh,and bone.
Ellen Hopkins
In control. Out of control. Sometimes they're the same thing. The trick is knowing it's okay to feel out of control once in a while, as long as you're sure you can regain the upper hand when you absolutely need to.
Ellen Hopkins
Taking no chances means wasting your dreams..
Ellen Hopkins
For a long while. Finally she says, I don't believe in love. Not sure it really exists, but even if it does for some people, it won't for me. She is serious. Then she lightens up. But, hey, if you think you love me, cool.
Ellen Hopkins
Our kiss eclipses all others, real, imagine, dreamed of. It is the beginning of time, it is the end of the ages.
Ellen Hopkins
One kiss, I was totally hooked.
Ellen Hopkins
We kissed for aboutthe thousandth time,No promises,no demands,Just solid rebuildingof shattered trust.
Ellen Hopkins
Why are we here? Is there, really, some intelligent design? Why do we cry for someone who leaves us, if there's some Grand Pearly Gate in the sky? Why worry about how we build our lives if the ultimate ending for all is death, a single breath away?
Ellen Hopkins
Do you ever dangle your toes over the precipice, dare the cliff to crumble, defy the frozen deity to suffer the sun, thaw feather and bone, take wing to fly you home?
Ellen Hopkins
I felt so fine I didn't once overanalyze the perfect emotion, budding inside. The one I'd always feared most.
Ellen Hopkins
I keep hearing that love isn't a logical emotion. Should I worry about that?
Ellen Hopkins
I don’t know449that much about the Bible, other than it waswritten thousands of years ago, which dilutesits relevance. However, I know its faithfulfollowers tend to cherry-pick verses to suittheir needs, the same way they cherry-pickwords or scenes from other books to labelobscene.
Ellen Hopkins
I blamed the Bible,when its words were not at fault,only the way they’re interpretedby those too willingto wield them like chain saws,cutting others off at the knees.
Ellen Hopkins
The problems with lies is they start to pile up, one on top of another, until it's hard to find your way out from under the heap.
Ellen Hopkins
Parenting should be a passion, not a part-time pursuit.
Ellen Hopkins
Honesty. Sobriety. My virginity. No way to regain the first two, I almost gave away the last.
Ellen Hopkins
Now that I have opened that bottle of memories they're pouring out like wine, crimson and bittersweet.
Ellen Hopkins
Empty is the perfect state of being. Nothing inside to anchor you. Nothing inside to chain you down, keep you from living your dreams. Empty, almost weightless, you are an eyelash afloat on a blink of breeze. You can rise about tension and worry, loosed from the grip of gravity. Adrift in thermal lift, you ride the wing of freedom and soar. Empty, you are Eve in Eden. Empty, you are what you were meant to be.
Ellen Hopkins
Anger is a valid emotion. It's only bad when it takes control and makes you do things you don't want to do.
Ellen Hopkins
I felt angry, frustrated.I felt I didn't belong, not in my,church, not in my home, not in my skin.
Ellen Hopkins
Does wanting to die equal losing your mind?
Ellen Hopkins
Hurt. Enough to want to make someone else hurt too.
Ellen Hopkins
Funny thing about the monster.The worse he treats you, the more you love him.
Ellen Hopkins
In my limited realm of experience, beginnings led to endings.
Ellen Hopkins
I nod, because I do understand. I'm just not sure how to go about divorcing myself from the evil I've already accepted.
Ellen Hopkins
Anger is easier than forgiveness.
Ellen Hopkins
Love is more than blind. It's brain-dead.
Ellen Hopkins