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Hatred wants to annihilate, but it annihilates by destroying, by making our awareness dull, by suppressing, by dividing. True Nature does not really annihilate, because something is not wiping out something else--there is no duality. The kind of annihilation that True Nature makes possible is more of a recognition, a precise understanding that Being reveals in us. We have no inner agitation in our attitude; we see and understand whatever impediment is arising, but we do not give it energy in the form of reaction, and thus it becomes still on its own and does not appear. We experience this as a dissolving or a melting, but what is actually happening is that the energy fueling the obstacle disappears, the obstacle loses its dynamism, and it simply stops arising.
A.H. Almaas
As long as you hold onto wanting something from the outside, you will be dissatisfied because there is a part of you that you are till not totally owning...How can you be a complete and fulfilled if you believe that you cannot own this part [of yourself] until somebody else does something?...If it is conditional, it is not totally yours.
A.H. Almaas