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If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.

P.J. O'Rourke
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There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380 SL convertible.
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Even I realized that money was to politicians what the eucalyptus tree is to koala bears: food, water, shelter, and something to crap on.
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The weirder you're going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too. When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing extraordinary about that person.
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We all know how 'modern democracies take loaves from the wealthy.' It's the slipups in the 'pass them out to the poor' department that inspire a study of Economics.
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You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.
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There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences.
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The American political system is like fast food--mushy, insipid, made out of disgusting parts of things...and everybody wants some.
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Americans appreciate bad taste or America wouldn’t look the way America does.
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