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Image of the quote is loading... SaveSave As accurate as a blind man pissing during an earthquake.”“Wow...,” I breathed.She frowned - Quote by Brandon Sanderson

As accurate as a blind man pissing during an earthquake.”“Wow…,” I breathed.She frowned

Brandon Sanderson
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Actually, [Wax] said, we came here because we needed someplace safe to think for a few hours."Ranette: "Your mansion isn't safe?"Wax: "My butler failed to poison me, then tried to shoot me, then set off an explosive in my study"Ranette: "Huh.... You need to screen these people better, Wax.
Brandon Sanderson
I like visiting people in prison. I can say whatever I want to them, and they can’t do anything about it.
Brandon Sanderson
Brightlord Adolin insisted. So long as you were in here, he wouldn't leave. We tried to stop him, but the man’s a prince. We can’t storming make him do anything, not even leave. He locked himself away in the cell and we just had to live with it.
Brandon Sanderson
Kaladin frowned. “Wait. Are you wearing cologne? In prison?”“Well, there was no need to be barbaric, just because I was incarcerated.”“Storms, you’re spoiled,” Kaladin said, smiling.“I’m refined, you insolent farmer,” Adolin said. Then he grinned. “Besides, I’ll have you know that I had to use cold water for my baths while here.”“Poor boy.
Brandon Sanderson
You'll want something mid-range. A 5.56 all right?""I suppose.""AR-15?""Ugh. AR-15? I'd rather not have my gun break down on me every second week." Besides, every wannabe and their dog had an M16 or M4 variant these days."G7.""Not accurate enough.""FAL?""A 7.62? Maybe," I said. "Though I hate the triggers.""As picky as a woman with her shoes," Abraham grumbled."Hey," I said. "That's insulting." I knew plenty of women who were pickier with their guns than they were with their shoes.
Brandon Sanderson
Ear demons are totally real," Cody said. "They're what make microphones like these ones work. They're also what tell you to eat the last slice of pie when you know Tia wanted it.
Brandon Sanderson
Does the king know you're back?""Nope! I'm trying to think of a properly dramatic way to inform him. Perhaps a hundred chasmfiends marching in unison, singing an ode to my magnificence.""That sounds… hard.""Yeah, the storming things have real trouble tuning their tonic chords and maintaining just intonation.""I have no idea what you just said.""Yeah, the storming things have real trouble tuning their tonic chords and maintaining just intonation.
Brandon Sanderson
Two blind men waited at the end of an era, contemplating beauty.
Brandon Sanderson
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